Listen. The Most Jesse Ever Learned About Why Ellie Even Went To Seattle To Avenge Joel In The First

remember when p.2

hey i played tlou and left behind recently so heres these two lil gals

what if 🤔 you defeated me in battle 😔 and when you tilted my head up with your blade beneath my chin 🗡️ we accidentally kissed 💋😳

ARCANE LEAGUE OF LEGENDS: 1x04 - "Happy Progress Day!" ↳ "It wasn't a mishap, she froze up and lost her sh¡t. I could've handled those brats. She's a problem and we all know it."

“how is it that you’re never scared?”

Hi there, anon last week who offered some criticism about bias/etc in response to the Joel essay. Was looking forward to your Abby essay and really wanted to be open minded but truthfully you managed to cherry pick the absolute shit out of moments in the game and ignored so many allusions/small nuances/moments that you claim aren’t in the game (Abby showing regret, etc). That take is one of the most biased takes yet that I have read about this game. Also your use of the word retarded to describe Ellie’s questionable decision making with Mel and Owen isn’t cool. If you’re capable of writing an essay like this, you’re capable of finding another word to use instead of that.

But onto the issues with some of the arguments. This is going to be long so buckle up. (I hope it sends in it’s entirety so apologies if it doesn’t). I don’t expect this to be posted, again this is just a criticism to try and point out some bias that I’m seeing coming through. I tried to stay in a linear order of examples you brought up but if I bounce around I apologize. There’s a lot of moments that you give as examples where you would seem to embellish what happened and twist it to fit the narrative that you wanted regarding Abby and her arc.

After Joel’s death, there’s references made to Abby not sleeping and we see that she’s still having nightmares about running into the operating room and finding her dad/finding Lev and Yara. If she truly felt justified in her actions and that she had gotten her revenge, why would she still be having nightmares about this subject? Perhaps she is feeling guilt and didn’t receive any closure from Joel’s death and it’s not until after she knows Yara is okay that we finally see some sort of closure where the nightmare of death turns into a dream. It could be argued that perhaps she’s found a new purpose in life after the end of a 4 year quest and that  through taking care of those that saved her life, she’s been able to move on because of this. There’s also moments during the opening of her half (specifically when we see the mansion scene again but from her view) that after the final blow, there’s no relief. For one or two moments, some of her expression look like she could be contemplating the extent of her own actions. It doesn’t seem like there’s any joy or happiness there.

Next. Expecting Abby to change her view on the Seraphites in two days because of some kids she saved is highly unrealistic. She has conversations with Lev though when they’re making their way up to the sky bridge where they discuss the religion, how the prophets teachings have been skewed over time. Even learning about them, the Seraphites would try to kill her regardless. There’s no reason for her to have a change of heart because she’s met two outliers to their religion. The majority of them still are religious fanatics.

As far as expressing remorse to Ellie for what she did to Joel, Abby didn’t know of Joel’s importance to Ellie in the same way that Ellie didn’t know it was Jerry’s death that Abby sought out vengeance for, not taking away the cure (as stated by Ellie int he theatre confrontation where she states ‘I’m the one you want, there’s no cure because of me’.” This was a really interesting decision on the writers part. Personally I would loved to have seen some sort of revelations with these but I also enjoy the fact that they never know how significantly their lives impacted each other. Abby had to reason to show Ellie remorse because she simply didn’t know the connection. For all she knew, Joel and Ellie could have been a randomly paired patrol group from Jackson. Not a father-daughter like bond.

I do agree with your assessment that perhaps Isaac had something to do with her dark ways. Clearly he has no qualms with brutal tactics and seeing as Abby is consistently referred to as one of the top WLF, it’s not unrealistic to assume that he had a direct hand into grooming her violent ways. That’s not to say she didn’t have a choice, but it’s an interesting concept to explore how he could have shaped the growth of a 16 year old Abby hell bent on revenge.

Owen’s drunk provocation of Abby is an interesting scene because Abby has always relied on Owen to be by her side. To hear his unfiltered thoughts on Joel’s torture could have come as a shock to the system because he has always been straight with her and to have someone as important to her as him paint her brutal actions in such a blunt, disapproving way could have maybe felt like a slight betrayal. There’s no excuse for Owen cheating on Mel, but we see a moment of weakness and vlunerability with the two of them. Not sure why the sex scene gets bashed so much. Whereas Ellie and Dina are allowed to be intimate (granted yes not anywhere near as explicit as Abby and Owen), there seems to be no issue with the former as opposed to the latter. Sex is natural. What’s so traumatizing about the scene? Genuinely curious.

Onto arguments about Seraphite island. You call the line from Yara a throw away line (about how there’s fighting and gun fire from the other way) yet if the conflict has spilled out to where they were, why would they go back that way? Abby trusted Lev and Yara to know a way out because she wasn’t familiar with the island. Why shut down their suggestions when she knows nothing about the layout or inner workings? Regarding Isaac, I don’t think Abby all of a sudden offering to torture a Seraphite would have been an automatic get out of jail free card. Isaac wanted the fight to be over, why would he allow one soldier to take a boat to take a child away for torture? In the grand scheme of things, this doesn’t make sense. Abby could have chosen to go back to the WLF but instead, she chose her new family (Lev). To act like she was best friends with all of the WLF and this means she shouldn’t have killed them once again doesn’t feel realistic. Even Isaac makes a comment about the Salt Lake Crew and how close they are, there’s no reason to believe that she went out of her way to befriend others when she already had her group. Abby more than likely would have gone to SB with Owen and the others (pre Mel conversation) since she was already an enemy of the WLF by that point. There’s no need to call writers less talented/less creative because you didn’t like the story. Resorting to personal attacks on their abilities doesn’t help your arguments. It comes off as petty.

Onto Abby ‘dragging’ Lev to the theater. You’re more than willing to point out Lev’s traumatic experiences but not Abby’s. Lev chose to give Abby the map. He had no reason to, but instead offered it up to her. Lev isn’t stupid. In his interactions with Abby, he shows an understanding of Owen’s importance to her so it’s not out of the box for him to understand the implications of giving her a literal map to the location of the person that had killed the two of them. As for why wouldn’t they give up Abby’s location: Mel was ready to do so and was going to. We know she doesn’t like Abby, figured she was likely dead, and saw a chance to perhaps save the two of them if she gave Ellie what she wanted. Owen cares for Abby and didn’t want to risk the possibility of Ellie finding her, interrupting the conversation before Mel could give any info. Owen approaching Ellie wasn’t wise, but how is his effort to try and deescalate anything other than an attempt to protect both himself and Mel?

Next. Abby did not respond with glee to learning Dina was pregnant. I’m not sure what you think glee is, but there’s nothing happy or joyful about the way she reacted. She’s fueled by blind rage at that point and it’s already been established she’s an eye for an eye type person. Ellie had killed Mel who was pregnant (she’s wearing a coat because there’s a giant ass rainstorm. I’m not sure why her wearing a coat would be so confusing and out of character?) and Dina happening to be pregnant would be an eye for an eye in Abby’s view. Does this make it right? No. But she was not jumping for joy and oh so happy to find that out.

Not sure what the qualms are with something as small as collections cards vs coins. It’s a video game. There was a chance to add more collectibles for a trophy so why not? This seems like a detail to just pick at just because you can. Giraffe/zebra, we knew in the first game wild animals were running around. Why is it out of the box for a group LIVING in SLC to make a hobby of watching them? Again, seems nitpicky. A father/father figure teasing a child about a relationship. Isn’t this just a dad thing? Again, feels nitpicky and serves no purpose as a legitimate critique. The museum/aquarium, are people not allowed to explore and have things they’re intersted in?’ These little details you throw in serve no real purpose other than to nitpick and are basing this off an emotional response instead of trying to use logic regrding game mechanics/achievements/explanations/etc.

Im sure there’s things I’m missing or that I forgot to mention but this has become quite long. As a wrap up, it feels like you truly haven’t tried to look at the game from a neutral perspective. Perhaps you really have tried, but that doesn’t really show in your essays. It shows as still having a strong bias towards anything that isn’t complimentary of Ellie or Joel and their stories. I do enjoy reading different perspectives on the game and having discussions, but I would still find it hard to approach and have a thoughtful discussion because there seems to be no openness and the vibe that you know the story better than the writers do. That paired with insults flung at the writers makes it feel like nothing more than a spiteful rant for not living up to your expectation rather than a constructive critique. I look forward to further essays and hope that perhaps the tone can become a bit more neutral in them. Have a great evening.

First of all, I wanna say thank you for reaching out and offering some critique, of course that is what I am hoping for (I'm not writing a 4500 word essay only to have it not be read and discussed), so again thank you for that. The next thing, you are absolutely right about the use of the word "retarded", I'll change that as soon as I posted this response. Regarding the cherry picking, I yet again have to agree with you. Of course I picked scenes that serve as (for me the most fitting) examples to support my claim/stance. I think you would agree that talking about every single scene of this game, especially in a single essay, is near impossible. So I instead reduced the list of my arguments to what I believed to be most crucial ones in informing my opinion (thus hoping they would also be most convincing to the reader). Before I go on to react to the specific arguments you make, and I had hoped I worded my essay in a way that that becomes clear, that essay is an outline of my thoughts in a way, it is me saying: this is my opinion/position/stance and these are reasons x, y, z of why I have that opinion. Subsequently, it is neither a definitive statement of any kind nor is it a critique to people who feel differently than me. I repeatedly say "in my point of view", "for me", "I expected", as well as giving room for other interpretations (I literally state that other interpretations are possible, and then went on to explain why I interpreted it the way I did). Which leads me neatly to your first argument. For you, Abby's nightmares read as an expression of guilt as well as other instances, allusions and nuances as you say, that could be interpreted this way. But that is exactly my critique. Interpretation is something so subjective and all these supposed allusions (again that is up to the individual's interpretation) are so incredibly vague that there is no way we could ever make a definitive statement about what they actually allude to. You reading it as guilt concerning Joel is absolutely and 100% justified, but me not doing so is just as legitimate. And Abby didn't strike me as feeling guilty the first time I played, and she still didn't the tenth time I did. Additionally, a glance that lasts a few seconds (and could be interpreteted in a marriott of ways) is unfortunately not substantial and concrete enough to balance out all the concrete evidence (Abby's actual actions) I have of her being a questionable person. This is one of the reasons why I needed Abby to have an actual conversation, to verbalize what's going on in her head. And it could have been with any one person, honestly, it didn't need to be Ellie. And I 100% agree with you there that we'd have to tweak a lot of the rest of the game if we were to arrive at my proposed alternative ending, since Abby wouldn't have the information needed (none of my proposed fixes work in isolation btw, so this goes for the Isaac confrontation as well). But it instead could have been a conversation with Lev, or Owen during that scene on the boat for instance (which I absolutely adore, by the way, it's one of my favourite scenes in the entire game). Owen's heartfelt monolgue could have been the perfect stepping stone for Abby to reveal her inner conflicts, thoughts, and motivations. But instead we get a sex scene. My issues here lies with the fact that they decided to show as much as they did for pure shock value (as opposed to implying it like they did with Ellie and Dina). But this is only issue #273 I have, so let's move on to the more important stuff. And this is where it gets interesting to me personally: You argue that Abby living with the WLF for the past four years would not lead her to having a strong enough connection to her comrades to not be willing to kill them. How is her connection to Lev so strong then after just 48 hours? Looks a lot like cherry picking to me. And this next argument has to be my favourite: You don't have to critize the writers just because you didn't like the story. Have you considered that I didn't like the story because it was

poorly written? I have no idea why people put writers on such a pedestal. It is their literal job. And when they don't do their job well I have the right to critize them for it. Abby dragging Lev to the theatre is and will remain inexcusable to me. First of all, Abby's "traumatic" experiences pale next to Lev's, but on top of that she's an adult and Lev a literal child. If you don't care that she's dismissive of his feelings and struggles here, because she prioritizes her own, that's your right. But I find it horrendous. "Glee" might have been the wrong word to choose here, but you still understand what I was trying to express. Her reaction to receiving that information is still messed up and concerning. And if Abby is indeed an eye for an eye type of character, and that is the supposed motivation for her to want to kill Dina, why then did Joel saving her life not lead to her letting him live in return? That would have been the eye for an eye solution, you saved my life so I will spare yours. And yet. Now, as the second to last thing, I want to address the critique that I do not come off as neutral enough. And I am absolutely aware of that. I had a second person proofread my essay before I posted it and they also let me know (even though I was aware of it beforehand) that as a reader one can tell that I am getting increasingly more frustrated as the essay goes on. And for a while I thought of going over the essay again to fix it to try to sound more neutral, objective and unemotional (like I did with my other two essays, that still aren't entirely neutral or free of personal bias by any means, as no text expressing opinions and feelings ever truly can be), but I ultimately decided against it. Not only is this a game specifically designed to elicit strong emotions, and pointing out all the issues I have did frustrate me, so why should I try to play that down? But also, why am I the only person expected to be completely rid of personal bias or emotions? Why are my arguments only seen as valid or legitimate if I present them in precisely the one way that suits you best? How am I expected to anticipate any one reader's interpretation and thus emotional reaction to my words and consciously construct my essay in a way which aims to prevent said reaction? No utterance, especially regarding opinions and feelings, is entirely neutral or free of personal bias. Your critique of my essay is filled with personal bias as well as it is emotionally charged. Does not take away from the legitimacy of your stance and/or arguments though, does it?

My priorities when I write these essays are: accumulating enough strong arguments to support my position, structuring them in a logical way as to assist the reader in recreating my thought process (to increase comprehension), wording it in a way that is as thorough while also as efficient as possible, attempting to word it in a way that is as neutral and objective as I can be (the exception being my Abby essay as I have just explained). And since I am not dismissive, condescending, or accusatory towards people who might disagree with me, I don't see a problem with being emotionally charged every now and then.

Now, finally I do wanna thank you again for voicing critique. I do appreciate it a lot. Not only for reading my essays, but again trying to look at them critically and informing me about issues you have found within my writing. It continues to force me to look at my own opinion with a critical eye and more often than not I have found myself persuaded by compelling arguments presented by people like you. And while you said you wouldn't be interested in having an open discussion/conversation, I would have to disagree, but I think an oral conversation would be more fruitful since I do get the feeling a lot might get lost by having it be a written conversation.

2nd part AU where Tess is alive 🤟

joel in p1: experienced survivor, emotionally unavailable, doesn't break easy, smart enough to predict an ambush, hot dilf.

joel in p2: dumbass who saves random people, doesn't even keep his bag or gun on him when doing so, exposes his name to strangers knowing what he did in the past, uwu soft teddy bear who cant remember his 20+ years of knowledge on survival, died as a hot dilf.

i cant stop thinking about joel. he died not knowing dina and ellie would have a family. he died thinking ellie probably hated him. joel will never be able to see JJ, named after Jesse/Joel. our mans will never see his babygirl ellie grow up into adulthood. he died worrying about his baby brother. the last thing he saw was ellie. the last thing he heard were her sobs and screams. joel deserved so much better like wtf.

yes ik he did shit that wasn't right. joel isn't perfect but who could be in the damn apocalypse? i personally stand by his decision on saving ellie at any costs. him lying is what made me mad but everything else i side with.

joels death hurt more than it should tbh. my attachment to that man is unhealthy so seeing his.. brutal and slow death hurt so bad.

ignore my rants im emotional rn i miss him

Can you write an imagine of jealous reader, Ellie and Cat are already dating and the reader has been avoiding and ignoring Ellie because of it. Unfortunately they get assigned patrol together throughout the ride Ellie tries to get the reader to talk laugh look at her anything but nothing does the trick, a horde forces them to stay overnight in an abandoned building. Ellie confronts the reader of their current behavior but the readers is just sour and petty toward her. The next day Cat is waiting at the gate and showers Ellie with kisses and hugs, Joel & Tommy are there for her too while the reader just walks pass them alone. Yes I love angst

Summary: Reader breaks ellie's heart and ellie breaks readers, will they ever be the same again

A/N: Thank you for the request <3 I love angst so much but writing it breaks my mf heart PLZZ. Sorry if this was short :(

Warnings: Angst, heartbreak and jealousy

Word count: 1.9k

"Ellie and Y/N will take the gas station." Tommy said.

Those words made your heart drop, god fucking dammit. You could already sense Ellie's excitement, she always got excited when you guys were assigned together. As of right now you were angry with ellie but she had no idea, fucking clueless.

Ever since cat and ellie got together you couldn't look at ellie without wanting to deck her in the face. You liked cat, she had done a tattoo of yours before, but you liked ellie... so much it hurt. Ever since she came to Jackson your stomach did twist and turn at the thought of her.

You would always catch her and cat making out with each other in the back of the church at dances, kissing by the fire when y'all would sneak out, holding hands while running from hoards. All the things you wanted Ellie to do with you she did with cat, it made you sick to your stomach.

"I don't think that's going to work out!" You shouted, causing everyone to turn around and look at you.

Tommy looked up from his clipboard, giving you a surprised look. The looks you were getting made you want to sink into the floor, especially the look Ellie was giving you. She looked at you with confusion but still looked so fucking cute while doing it.

"The gas station I mean...." You tried to save yourself but you could sense you were failing miserably. "I've never done the gas station before and I would feel more comfortable doing something I've done before."

That was a lie, the gas station was probably one of the easiest places too clear but you couldn't go with ellie.... it would be torture. Some of the others in the room laughed silently knowing how easy the gas station actually was, it's not like you couldn't do it.

"Y/n, i can't c...." Tommy started but was interrupted by ellie.

"I can show her!" She blurted out, a stupid smile on her face.

You gave Ellie a death stare, almost as if she just shot a loved one in front of you. You wanted to say something but you didn't want to dig the hole deeper so you just bowed your head down and threw your bag over your shoulder.

"Okay then... it's settled." Tommy started, handing you a key to the gas station. "You guys leave tonight!"

It's only for a couple of hours, the worst that can happen is getting stuck up in a hoard and having to stay at the gas station overnight with ellie. You hoped it would go smoothly though, clear the gas station and its surroundings then get out. easy enough

-

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Of course the worst that could happen, happened for you. You had been ignoring Ellie ever since you left. No words were spoken on your end, just a few okay's and half ass instructions. Ellie was really trying to get you to talk to her, like everything in her power.

Ellie felt she did something wrong or you hated her for some reason, which was odd because not long ago you guys had been really close. She was getting really worried about you, you just didn't seem like yourself lately.

The assignment was going well, there weren't many infected to kill so it was super easy. That night came along and the hoard came through, but the hoard was the least of your problems at the moment. You and Ellie were trapped in a small room in the back of the gas station, door bolted shut and very little room.

It wouldn't be that bad usually, you would actually quite like it, being all trapped and cozy with ellie. That was until ellie decided to tongue fuck cat every second of every day, now it just wasn't the same.

You guys were now sitting at the small fire you had created, wrapped up in your jacket while eating a can of beans. Ellie was poking at the fire, watching as the flames danced around the wood. Ellie looked nice in the glow of the fire, enough to make your heart skip a beat but not too get out the images of you third wheeling every time cat was around.

"I'm getting tired of this weather man." Ellie spoke, putting down the stick and curling up under her own blanket.

You stayed silent, eating your beans and watching as the fire dulled a bit. You hated winter, especially when you had to go out in it. It made it harder to travel on horseback and by foot, so you were basically fucked.

Ellie let out a small sigh, you could sense the hard hitting question from a mile away. The silent treatment, all the dirty looks, the bitterness.... Ellie wanted to know what your damn problem was before she exploded.

"What's wrong?? Why are you mad at me?" She asked, causing a slight eye roll from you.

You felt stupid yes but you couldn't help it, ever since ellie got here you felt for the first time maybe there was some light in this fucked up world. You were being stupid and jealous but you really liked ellie and obviously she would go for someone like cat.

A couple seconds of complete silence went by like hours, Ellie staring you down as you tried everything not to look at her. You were afraid you would never be able to stop looking at her, you just wanted to sleep, not fight with the love of your life.

"Is this about cat? I mean ever since we started dating you've been acting like this." She spoke, her voice nothing but calm and filled with complete concern.

Even though she was being nice, her voice was silky smooth through the rough air, that was enough for you to snap. All the anger and hatred all piled up in one tiny body, a body that has been broken over and over again and this was the last time it was going to be broken.

"Jesus christ ellie!" You shouted, enough for the infected to hear. "Is everything about cat!"

Ellie was surprised she got you to talk, after not talking to her for days or even weeks it felt, the first thing out of your mouth is pure venom. Ellie did like you, that was the whole point of her wanting to talk to you but she thought you didn't like her back and the friendship you had she didn't want to ruin because she knew what happened when friends kiss friends... She learned her lesson.

Ellie's heart broke a little when you raised your voice, she never wanted to hurt you or be hurt by you. She let out a small breath before taking up the courage to look you in the eye and speak. Your anger filled up the entire small room.

"So you don't like cat?" She asked the stupidest question she could have asked at this moment.

You felt like your body was literally shaking. You were so angry, why can't she just shut up and leave you alone...something normal people would do when people ignore them for days at a time. But you forget Ellie isn't any normal girl, she's heartbroken and scared of being left alone.

The next thing that came out of your mouth was horrible, something not even Ellie deserved in this moment and you will never forget it. You balled your fist up in the sheets, holding back your tears as you let out

"Have you ever considered maybe i don't like you!" You shouted, venom flowing out of your lips.

Ellie's eyes twitched, pure sadness hit her all at once. It hurt, it really hurt Ellie more than any wound she could suffer. She felt like her heart was being crushed in a million pieces, the heartbreak she has felt many times before.

You felt bad, so bad that you yourself could cry. If it was an option to stand outside in the hoard and let them eat you alive, you would do it. Ellie didn't deserve you snapping at her, but obviously you couldn't show that. If it made it so she didn't talk to you ever again and finally left you alone to wallow in your own self pity, you would say it again even.

"Y/n i..." She started, eyes hooked on yours, not once looking away.

"I'm going to bed, we have to leave early...you should get some sleep." You interrupted, not even giving her a minute to speak.

You laid down, body turned turns the door so ellie couldn't see the tears that flowed down your face. Ellie deserved cat, they were a match made in heaven... you just couldn't be led on anymore. It's shitty yes but there's nothing you can do now.

You could hear Ellie shuffle next to you, back turned to you as well. You let out a few silent sobs, face pressed harshly against the pillow so Ellie couldn't hear you. You shouldn't have come, you should've done everything in your power not to come here.

The trip back is going to suck...

-

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-

You both woke up in the crack of dawn, gathering all of your stuff in your backpacks before opening the door to see the hoard had moved up north. You both stayed silent throughout the entire trip, not wanting to talk after last night.

Your trip went smoothly, the only sound was birds chirping and the sound of the river flowing. It was beautiful, but you didn't care, the view was ruined by the awkward silence that had aroused since last night. You hated yourself so much at the moment, you ruined your chances of ever getting close with ellie.

At the gate Ellie stopped for a minute, turning around to stop you dead in your tracks. This was the first time this morning you had looked at her face, her eyes had been puffy and your nose had been stuffed up, apparently you weren't the only one crying last night. Her eyes met yours, dried tears streaked her face.

"I don't know why you hate me but I love you Y/N and I want you to know that.... not even some petty words can ever stop me from loving you. Whatever you're going through... I hope it gets better because you don't deserve it." She stated, eyes watering as she tried to break eye contact.

Fuck you ellie... You thought, now feeling like more of a piece of shit. You hated being the one to hurt her and her still loving you even if you did basically punch her in the face with your words. You couldn't hate her either, you were madly in love with her but it hurt you too much to see her with cat. You opened your mouth to say something

"Ellie!!" A woman's voice squeaked, it was cat.

Ellie wiped her cheeks before cat jumped on her, placing her lips on Ellie's. You watched, wanting so badly to sob right there. You felt what Ellie felt last night, pure heart break. Cat jumped down from off her, giving her an award winning smile.

"I missed you so much babe!" Cat spoke, placing her hands on Ellie's cheeks.

You could see Tommy and Joel come to welcome her back, but you didn't stay for very long. You walked past them, walking into the gate before setting your stuff down. Ellie's words echoed in your head, telling you that she loved you and you just stood there dumbfounded.

You knew you would always be the girl that had hurt Ellie, she would always look at you like that but she would still love you no matter what and that in itself hurt you like crazy.