Latest Posts by wormwithagun - Page 5
my dad, yelling at the radio with sports commentators that he put on: shut up!!! there are no more Sports
ok this happened a few days ago but
my millennial ap government and politics teacher, randomly in the middle of class, turning around from her computer: guys guess what! coronavirus has been declared a global pandemic!!
entire class: *begins cheering and clapping*
apgov teacher: yeah!!
this was before anyone even thought we would get school off
oh to be a little worm in the mud, unaware of homophobia and simply there to squirm
I just heard a mike bloomerg ad on the radio??wth!! you dropped out, mike!!! GO AWAY!!!!!!
my ap government and politics teacher:
did you guys watch the democratic debate last night? I didn’t. I was watching the sonic movie.
my friends don’t think i’m funny but at least 13 people on tumblr do
sometimes I want my insides to be wet
not in a sexy way but in a soup way
wtf I wanna be the gay cousin not the mentally ill cousin
yeah, right. how can I be attracted to girls when I can’t even talk to them?
I hate when people post more than once a day on literally any platform like “it’s good for the algorithm uwu” like no stfu I dont care this much about you
(To the tune of fireflies)
you better believe a bi
when they tell you that they like guys
and girls and everyone in between
How did you write an essay as if it were a post on tumblr
hey yall!!! i’m writing a paper on using preferred pronouns for a class and i wanted to share the first paragraph i wrote because i like it!!
I believe in using preferred pronouns. The reason I hold this belief so strongly, no joke, ties in directly with my take on the meaning of life. To be honest, we’re all just floating about on this space orb we call Earth, there isn’t much rhyme or reason to anything we do. But you know what’s the coolest thing we can do on this funky ball? We can make people happy! We can spread joy, legitimately the most rad superpower and any of us can do it! “But!” I hear you say as you read this (I have very good hearing), “I haven’t a dime to my name for spreading such joy”. To this I say fear not! Because a specific, wonderful group of people use something called “preferred pronouns”. I absolutely LOVE learning a person’s preferred pronouns, because in my eyes, it’s as if being offered a magic key, engraved with the words “hey! If you ever want to make me feel happy, use this!”. Dear friend, you have just given me a superpower, and I cannot wait to use it!
why do some people say “Omg that’s so funny!!” instead of just laughing? who hurt you
not to be straight but I actually have 2 different types of bois I’m in to
Nice, kinda nerdy boys. They have a really dumb sense of humor and are able to laugh with you, but they can also have a serious discussion about politics or a movie. They’re smarter than you’ll ever be, but it’s ok because they aren’t narcissistic about it and never try to argue with your core beliefs. They’d offer to pay for dinner but wouldn’t bat an eye if you offered to pay. They wanna take things slow and nearly die at the idea of just holding your hand. They truly do care about you and just wanna make you smile.
and eboys
not to be a bisexual stereotype but I get crushes on everyone in a ten foot radius
what does it mean when your ex-girlfriend comes up to you and whisperers that your shirts in the past few days have been verygay
I’m sorry guys lizzie is actually short for lesbian
lizzie is short for lizard
panic! at the vsco
killer queen by queen has panic! at the disco energy
I have lost Girl
me: is sad, depressed, anxious, and stressed
me: what?? how is this possible?? i have Girl???
regular twizzlers suck ass but the pull n’ peel twizzlers also suck ass but it’s my ass they’re sucking
the entire month of august is like the sunday evening of the year where you think you have your shit together but at 11pm you realize theres school tomorrow & your shit is completely not together
two lesbians, chillin’ in a hot tub, five feet apart because they’re each not sure if the other one likes them and they’re both too scared to make the first move
me, eating gummy bears: down the water slide you go, little buddy :)