Chapter 2

Entry #16, 9/11/19

Currently in the bus, on my way to school. I thought I'd quickly tell you how my therapist reacted, since I promised you said info: he apologized, multiple times, and- well, we had other things to talk about, so I changed the subject after a while. He recommended a book (about psychology), and I'm hopefully gonna be able to get it soon. I mean, if someone, whose profession is psychology, recommends a book, it has to be good, right? It's about childhood and trauma, and how to detect one, too, I think. I'll take a look at it later. See you!

Entry #21, 22/10/19

Apologies for my inactivity. I was at my big sister's place, and for obvious reasons I had no time to keep you updated.

Now that that's all cleared up... I have news. I got alcohol markers today! (From Touch, if anyone's wondering.) They're my first ones, and I of course already tried them out. I'll show you the result in the following post, maybe I'll publish all the pictures I took (from sketch to shading). Depends on if I want to or not. I personally think it turned out alright for my first attempt, and the fact that I was kinda experimenting with the thickness of the fineliner and the darkness of the shadows. I'm actually surprised I got the sketch not to look like absolute garbage, unlike normally.

I've decided to question my friendship with Pesto. He made fun of my interests (especially watching Anime and reading Warrior Cats), always tries to make me stay in a call with him by saying

You're just going because you don't like me.

Even after I said I'm tired. I immediately thought of it as toxic behavior, but ignored it, not noticing how much I wanted to avoid any conversation.

Yep, that's pretty much everything that has happened.

I'll see you around!

-Mary

Entry #5

So today, nothing much happened. Sophie couldn't text until about 21 o'clock, and Pesto was busy too. But he sent me the link to his YT-Channel, and up until now he has three videos. One of which being a recorded stream of the game ''Outlast''. Since I really, really enjoy psychic-horror games, I jumped riiiight in. But I'm also paranoid when I watch let's plays like that, so I was excited but terrified at the same time.

The weather didn't change that much. It got a little colder tho, so I guess that's good.

Jesus... I can hear my neighbor snoring, and he lives an apartment over me. I can hear him loud. And clear.

... how does his family put up with that???

Anyways... nothing else really happened. Goodnight, sweet dreams!

Chapter 1

She looked around the student flooded entrance of UA high, the school where heroes were formed. There were people all around, but not a single familiar face. She looked up again, taking her time to take in the beautiful view of the high school she was about to enter. The warming sun hit her face, and she read the initials she had seen so often before once again, still not believing her light grey eyes. She wasn't dreaming, it was real; she was about to enter the building, even though she was 3 weeks late, and she was going to get taught how to be a hero by real pros. With a now determined look on her face, she turned her face to the actual doors, and entered the old, huge school. The second she entered, she already loved the sight. She took it all in: the view, the smell, even the atmosphere. She took it in her heart, as if it could be ripped from her at any second, and started moving again after a good minute. The hazelnutbrown haired girl looked for her classroom, and found what she was looking for soon enough: ''CLASS 1-A'', the sign above the door said. She took a deep breath, opened the door, and saw a class full of students her own age, just joking aroud. She imagined all of this to be so different; in the many, many sleepless nights she had, where most of her thoughts revolved around her new school in a whole different coutry, the famous UA high, she imagined how the students would be, and she always came to the same result: top-students, stern, determined to win, serious. But here they were, just joking around, laughing, one was yelling, he had his ashblond hair spiked away from his head, another one was staring at the girls who were giggling and laughing. She took a closer look at the little guy, and quickly noticed the deep purple ball-shaped thigs on his head. not wanting anyone to know she was staring, she looked for a seat, and luckily found one near the widow. It was a lonely little desk that looked like it was moved there on a short notice. She sighed, put her backpack down, took out her notebook and started writing.

The day just started, but this school is already way different from what I expected. There is not a speck of seriousness coming from most of the students, just laughter can be heard, the silent sound of gossip, and nervous shuffling of bags and paper. How much more different from my imagination can it get? Will the teachers be as nice as I thought they'd be? Is there anything like I expect it to be?

The teacher entered, the students went back to their desks, only the sound of moving furniture was breaking the newly earned silence. The teacher with long, black hair cleared his throat, uttered a >>Good morning, class.<<, and sat down.

>>Good morning, Mr. Aizawa!<< the students reply in unision. The teacher who seems to be Mr. Aizawa motions them to sit down, and turns his gaze to Mary, the new girl, the one in the back, sitting at the helplessly placed desk, with a notebook laying open in front of her. >>Alright<<, he raised his voice once again, >>we have a new student, as you might have noticed. Mary, would you come to the front and introduce yourself please?<< Mary obiediently stood up, made her way to the front, positioned herself next to Aizawa, and started talking. >> Hi. I'm Mary, I'm 14 years old, and I come from Germany, which is the reason for my accent and my late appearance. I apologize in advance for any wrong pronounciation, or grammar mistakes. I truly am trying my best to make my English understandable. I was accepted due to recommendation. Thank you for listening.<< And with that, she walked back to her seat. what the class didn't know, after they heard her little speech, was, that Mary had spent hours on end changing and perfecting those few sentences, because she thought the whole class expected her to sound as formal as an important business man. She felt a little awkward, having everyone stare at her like she was crazy for sounding like an adult, but she just contered their confused looks with a smile. Aizawa turned the attention back to him. >>Thank you, Mary. Now, let's starts today's lesson...<<

Mary was only half listening. She was passing her time by examining every student in her class. One stood out. He haid red and white hair, parted neatly in two halves. The right half of his hair was a brilliant white, the other side a bright red. There was a scar as red as the hair covering it partly on his left eye. Mary started to wonder. ''What happened to him? Did he dye his hair? How is that posible?'' Those were only some of the questions she had. When she finally let her gaze wander to the next student, he was already looking at her. When she met his eyes, he just winked, smirked, and turned back to the board. ''what... the actual.. Chinchilla?'' The boy had bright yellow hair, and a bolt on one side of his scalp. There was nothing too interesting, really, but somehow Mary still wanted to talk to him. Maybe to actually have a friend, maybe to ask him what she missed while she was gone, or maybe she just wanted to know why he did that. She never has been flirted with before, if that was even considered flirting. She had to admit, he did look kind of cute. And of course that means he's either gay, taken, or a racist. Since that was all there was to see about that boy, she turned her attention to a girl with.. pink skin? And horns?? Mary didn't believe her eyes. >>How is that even...?<< she started silently, but stopped herself, not wanting to draw any attention to herself. Only then she realized, that there was literally a bird person just chillng in his seat, taking notes. She couldn't wait for recess so she could ask all about their names, their quirks, and who was taken and who wasn't. Let's see, who actually looked like they'd have a partner. The yellow-haired one with a blot in his hair, the guy who had his long, red hair styled into spikes, the red and white haired one, that just seemed to have some kind of terrifying secret, the... wait a minute. Mary knew who he was. He was Endevours son, Shoto Todoroki! She read something about him in the news just a couple of weeks ago. No wonder she got that weird, secretive vibe from him. There were a lot of rumours in all of the internet about the father-kid relationships being all crazy and horrible. She could really relate to him to an extend. Mary's mother and father have been emotionally distant ever since she was old enough to do stuff on her own. At the tender age of seven she had to cook for herself, but that didn't stop her from being an absolute sweetheart to her friends. And although she would never admit it, she was a pure soul. Apart from the smut she has read throughout the last few years, she was as clean as the air in a forest, far away from humanity and polution. Yes, she was a bit of a pervert. But she was too shy to actually spy on someone. She wasn't afraid to flirt, though. Most people didn't take it serious when she flirted with them and laughed it off, so she has been single up to that day. When she was honest with herself, she knew that she really wanted to have someone to hold her close and listen. But who would take a girl like her? She asked that question a lot when she thought about relationships. That's why she didn't do that often.

Mary found it amusing how her mind wandered off all the time. It was like her brain was making a path on it's own, like it was trying to lead her somewhere, someplace special that might not ever be discovered by anyone else... unless she told the person about that place, that secret space where she can get lost in for hours on end, without anyone noticing she was even gone in the first place. She doesn't leave her spot, but is in a whole different world at the same time, a world where she can be herself without having anyone there to judge her, without any rules, without any boundaries. She could kill, kiss, and insult anyone as much as her heart desired. She lost count of how often she brutually murdered someone in her mind. And the fact that she could imagine anything pretty vividly just made the whole game better. Same goes for kissing and making out, and everything beyond that. But it was also a curse at times. Whenever some said: >>imagine if...<<, she immediately started imagining it. She had seen multiple people making out, and that was worse of an experince than it might seem like. Because it wasn't just people her age, it was also teachers, heroes, old people and even animals.

All of a sudden, she was ripped from her thoughts, by someone standing in front of her. It was a green haired boy with freckles and a bright smile. >>H-Hey! Mary, right? I'm Izuku Midoriya, but everyone calls me Deku!<< He extended a hand for her to shake. She took his hand, gave it a light squeeze, and smiled back. >>Yep! That's me! Nice to meet you, Deku!<< She shiftd the thoughts of death and brutal murder aside and made room for information about him. He was barely taller than her, had emerald green eyes, had really fluffy looking hair, and just seemed really adorable overall. Mary guessed that he was most likely gay. Which was definetly not a bad thing, Yaoi all the way, but she had a feeling that at least one girl had a crush on him. Speaking of girls, there was one right behind him. She smiled at Mary and held out her hand too. >>I'm Ochako Ururaka!<< she chirped happily. Mary took her hand, gave it a little squeeze too, and smiled even brighter than before. >>Mary! I'm looking forward to being in class with you two!<< she said friendly.

She inspected them, then bluntly asked >>Are you two a couple?<< Ururaka started blushing madly, and so did Deku. He was the first one to actually respond. >>N-No, we're just f-friends!<< Mary chuckled at their reaction. >>If you say so~<< she purred while smirking. Then she turned her attention to the bo from earlier. >>Hey, you two, who is he?<< she pointed at the yellow haired boy. >>Th-That's Denki Kaminari. He's part of the Bakusquad, unlike Bakugo himself really nice and outgoing, though.<< Izuku started. >>But he's kind of a flirt.<< Ururaka added. So that was the reason why he winked. He's flirtasious. Great, she thought. >>Hey, how about we introduce you to everyone?<< Izuku said, now calming down his blush. >>That'd be

great!<< Mary thanked him.

Everything went great, until it was her time to meet Bakugo.

>>End chapter 1<<

Entry #22, 11/5/19

Hello, everyone. I’ve found the time and ways to finally update. I got a laptop, and I’m still figuring out how to actually work with it, but I’m managing. At least I can continue writing my story without having to wait 5 hours for my computer to boot up and the program to start. I should probably add, that this is my first laptop since I could never really afford one, but my mother got this one (which was her old one before) fixed, and she has a new one. Hooray for me. Anyways. I wanted to let all of you (aka nobody in particular, just future me) know, that my tumblr app, which I used before to post and all, has an error that makes me unable to use it. That’s why I wasn’t able to post. But since I’ve got a solution for that problem now, I should be able to post more or less regularly.

Apart from that, not much has been going on. I am aware that I’m not doing enough for school and I didn’t do my homework, I should probably study right now rather than updating here, but am I going to do so? No, of course not. Why? Well, mainy because I don’t want to. I should bring some dicipline into my life, I know, but who needs dicipline when they can have fun? Or at least not be annoyed or unhappy. My personal opinion is, that you should do what makes you happy, but you should also work for your happiness. Nothing is free in this world.

Ah, another day, another rant. but I should (rather want to) lay down in my bed now, and probably either read or draw. I wish everyone a good night, evening or morning, goodbye.

Hamilton with bnha

Quirk, Quirk

Angelica

Quirk, Quirk

Eliza~

And Peggy

The hero sisters~

It's 1:50 guys pls help

I thought I'd share. This picture was taken on the 9/14/19, saturday, at about 19:50. I was outside the whole afternoon, and went away with the sun. It was a great day, just relaxing in the sun, listening to music, reading my favorite book, enjoying my own company...

Entry #24, 11/20/19

Greetings. I am currently on the ‘vacation’ I told you about in the last entry. The journey yesterday was beyond burdensome. My sister didn’t want to help move the luggage and basically just pouted the whole time, because ‘‘It’S tOo HeAvY’‘, and my mother (whom I will refer to as Voldemort from now on) was just there, not doing anything about my little sister’s laziness. Apparently (according what she said) I was a lazy piece of sh- when I watched over the remaining luggage instead of helping moving it around. Most likely because she had to help Voldemort.

After our arrival, though, things have been pretty great. I/We have a ‘‘flat’‘ in the second house; it has a small bathroom (but still big enough to fit a shower, toilet and sink), a bedroom with two beds and a table, and a ‘‘main area’‘, where there is another bed, two cupboards and a table. All in all, it would be pretty cozy and great... if there wasn’t my mother packing it with tons and tons of stuff. She has a cupboard full of food, even though we get served breakfast, lunch and dinner, and has packed 3, I repeat, 3 suitcases for her alone.

>>one is for arts and crafts, one is my luggage and one is for your very thick clothing.<<, she said. I think now might be the appropriate time to inform you that I packed my own suitcase with everything I need. After all, I am old enough to pack my own clothes etc.

Moving on to today: I woke up at 6.30, went to have breakfast, then straight to the ‘‘school’‘, only to be greeted by about 15 kids under the age of 11. I did the only thing I could think of, and sat down at a lonely table in the corner of the room. Only a few minutes later, a kid sat down next to me and we just kinda started to play a random game. Soon after, another boy (about 9) sat down with us and just joined the game. The entire group then sat in a circle, and we started telling each other our names. I don’t remember many of them, but there was one boy that stood out. After saying his name, he stated that he would turn 14 in three days (just like me), and just said that he hates people. It was too relatable to actually be true. And as if that wasn’t enough, he also has a little sibling of his own gender (just like me #2). I don’t know his brothers name, though. Nor his last name. But I will hopefully find out soon. Why not stalk him a little, eh?~

Ah, it’s getting late. I will go to bed now, goodbye and goodnight you beautiful people~

Mary out~

Entry #19, 9/26/19

Hello. In the past week I got new shoes, black ones, along with black fingerless mittens. I do have almost everything in black, except for my phone case. It's purple going over to blue, and I can't even put into words how much I can't stand it. It has the wrong colors, small (obviously fake) diamonds on the side, and it's overall too glittery. It maakes me want to puke, but as long as I don't have anything else, I'll have to live with it.

I started writing a little fanfiction out of boredom, and two of the three people I showed it to think it's good. I might publish it, but only here. There are too many people that follow my wattpad to post it there. Yes, I do consider 62 (I think?) too many. Nobody comes around here, so yeah. I'm already working on chapter two, and fortunately I'll have enough time for that on the weekend.

Me and Sophie started talking daily again. We're currently roleplaying, only boku no hero academia for now. Maybe Creepypasta will be a project for the future again, who knows?

Nothing else really happened, but there's a lot of exams coming up, but other than that there's no interesting thing to talk about anymore. So goodbye, readers.

Memories #1

Reminder: TW. Verbal and implied/threatened physical abuse, lying

It was just after I moved in with my sis. We were cleaning the room I would be staying in by chucking all of the furniture out of my window into one of those big containers, listening to Matt's music. We were all having good fun, I don't think she was mad or anything. It was mainly me and Matt working, but the kids helped. Back then, Maya wasn't as much of a little [nice person], but José didn't like me cuz he hadn't gotten used to me yet. Things seemed more or less normal, yet I couldn't help but feel a certain pressure. I thought it would get better over time. I thought maybe if I got used to the rules... and it was so big of a change... and with the new environment.... I should've listened to my intuition. I kept saying "It's too late to get out of it now, you're already here and started to renovate and everything", hoping I was wrong and it wouldn't be as bad. The change came gradually; at first, she was super sweet to me. Not even two months later she screamed at me for the first time and I got to see the best side of her. It's not that she hadn't chastised me before, but she never raised her voice like that.... or thrown kitchen utensils at me or the kids. As the children and I were on the ground, gathering the knives, forks and spoons on all fours, she kept screaming and throwing things, and that was the first time she threatened to hit me. She raised her hand to grab something else very close to me and I flinched. She berated me for it, saying I've never been hit before and so I shouldn't act like it, that I don't have the right to react that way. I don't remember much else from what she said, mainly calling us selfish and lazy (which, as you will notice, she did a lot) and reminding me that I could always move out if I don't want to comply with her rules (which is also something you'll hear a lot). The most memorable part of that entire situation is the fact that when she stopped screaming and came back from smoking outside, she smirked at me and said "Now you saw that I can get a bit mad sometimes." The idiot I was I told her it's fine. I didn't want her to get mad again. God, I was so scared, I wanted to get the hell out of there first chance I get. But then I kept getting deeper and deeper in the legal process of everything, and, in the end, I just,,,, didn't say anything. I kept lying to authorities to not cause any trouble. Telling CPS I'm doing great here, that we sometimes fight but only in the fashion normal for siblings, and every time I said something I would look at her for approval and to see if I had said something wrong. I didn't want to make her mad or look bad in front of these people.