This Is My First Headcanon/yap So Pls Dont Judge Me Lol😭 Anyway Headcanons(?) Of What Simon Ghost

/(◕‿◕)/

not satisfied but i refuse to work on this any longer

REAL

my friend said to me today that all the military men i like look like they’d beat women, and while i know she meant the irl guys, nobody can tell me simon ‘ghost’ riley would ever lay a hand on the person he loves like that.

like you’re gonna sit here and tell me a man who knows what it’s like to be hit and harassed and literally tortured would hit his partner?? (not that they know that bc all they do is clown on my interests but that’s beside the point.)

Simon ‘Ghost’ Riley would lay a hand someone like that outside of his job? Mister ‘my hands are only used for violence except for you because you don’t deserve that’? be so serious, please.

love this

here is something people have been talking about, but add a bit of ✨spice✨: ghost with autism. more specifically the hyperempathetic kind, that's why he has to detach himself from everyone because otherwise he's overwhelmed by how he feels. the kind that he wears socks at all times when he isn't cleaning himself, because the texture of a pair of socks is consistent. the kind where he's touch-averse, but he seeks the grounding feeling of heavy weight, tight squeezes, and persistent touches to keep him grounded. the kind where he stims by taking apart his guns, cleaning them more times than necessary, and makes everyone think he's just "particular".

autistic ghost>>>

especially with his past. i feel like his dad would have said some shit about empathizing and how it was weak. so ghost definitely starts avoiding people who he gets too close with. except for soap. because soap literally wouldn't leave him alone.

he needs to be grounded. the constant betrayals he's been through, he needs something to remind himself that he's 'safe', that he doesn't need to be as alert as he always is, so the texture of his socks and weighted items (be it a weighted blanket, soap, or both) help his mind relax. even if its just a little bit.

If asked about why he cleans and takes apart his guns so much, ghost will make a comment about 'making sure they're in working order' or 'never know when something will go wrong'. he just really like the clicking sounds and the texture of the cloth use to clean the guns.

LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE SM

Stranger

John Price x wife!reader OC

Summary: John Price finally puts an end to his wife being stalked.

Warnings: Sexual themes, violence, blood, murder, death, stalking, allusions to sexual assault, mentions of child endangerment, torture, mentions of war, kidnapping, PTSD, anxiety attack, not edited.

——————

“Jj, stop teasing your sister.”

“But mum-“ Jj had a cheeky smile on his face before he was interrupted.

“Oi, enough!” John voice barked from down the hall as he walked toward the kitchen.

Tonight was a good night with your family. You had finished up dessert which was an ice cream sundae feast. The kids were over the moon when you and John broke out all the toppings you bought as a surprise from the shop. You felt your heart swell watching John set up everything with a huge grin across his face. In the aftermath there was chocolate syrup, caramel sauce, marshmallows, and rainbow sprinkles all over the kitchen island that you were now cleaning up.

“Daddy!” Lily exclaimed and ran to John as he walked into the kitchen, his eyes fixed on you in his white t-shirt and a pair of your leggings.

His four year old was already in her pajamas and her hair damp from her bath. She wore pastel green pants with Grogu from the Mandalorian on them, and a white t-shirt with the same character. Lily ran straight into John’s leg and clung to him. A loud crack of thunder made your house shake as the heavy rain continued to beat down.

“Daddy you have to save me.” Tugging on John’s sweat pants he had to grip the waistband so Lily didn’t drag them down.

“Save you?” John asked before picking her up and then being clung to in a vice grip.

“Ow! Lily, go easy.” John hissed as Lily’s finger nails dug into the exposed skin of his bicep while the other tugged on his beard.

“Yeah or the forest will swallow her up!” Jj jumped off his chair as he shouted his teasing words at Lily. This made Lily whimper into John’s chest, her fingers tugging harder at John’s facial hair.

“Hey, I said stop it.” You scolded Jj who didn’t seem to take you seriously and continued to make scary faces, eerie noises, and wiggle his finger at Lily.

“Daddy.” Lily whined into John’s neck, one sapphire eye visible as she stared at her big brother.

“Stop trying to scare your sister. Her shadow does enough of that.” John’s joke had you lightly chuckling along with him.

He wasn’t wrong there. It didn’t take much to scare Lily and she did once scream and try to out run her shadow, not knowing what it was. She tripped and fell in her mad dash which only made things worse that day.

“Can I sleep with you and mummy?” Lily whispered to John so you couldn’t hear.

You and John tended to ping pong back and forth on who was a big softy. Lately John had been giving in to all the small requests and spoiling your children. Whereas you were setting limits because you thought they were getting out of control at times. Jj especially, for some reason he’d been teasing both his sisters to tears recently.

“I’ll have to ask your mum. . . but yes.” John whispered the last part. Lily giggled and gave him a kiss to the cheek while snuggling closer.

“Why’s there a man in the yard?” Evelyn asked.

She was standing by the backdoor and staring out into your pitch black backyard. With squinted crystal blue eyes she tilted her head to the side and then leaned forward to get a better look. Lily tensed up at her sister’s words and looked at John with wide eyes and a big frown.

“What did your mum just say?” John asked expectantly, one thick eyebrow quirked.

“But-“ Evelyn pointed, not taking her eyes off the yard.

“Stop trying to scare your sister. Bed, now.” John cut off Evelyn not giving her a chance to continue.

“But-“

“Evie, bed.” You jumped in a lot sweeter.

“Stop being fuckin’ stupid Evie, you’re gonna get us grounded.” Jj playfully jabbed. You gasped at the language and so did Lily.

“Stupids a bad word!” Lily looked at a John in shock. He couldn’t even address Jj’s language and burst out into a loud belly laugh.

“Watch the language.” You chuckled and Jj nodded with a cheeky eye roll.

Walking over to your oldest daughter you lightly guided her by the shoulders to head upstairs. With a kiss to the top of the head Evelyn followed her father and siblings as he brought them upstairs to tuck them in.

You went back to putting the dishes away and sipping on the glass of wine John poured you. It wasn’t common that you had wine during the week, it was more of a special occasion thing. But you had a feeling John was trying to get lucky tonight and he was bettering his chances by getting you liquored up.

Taking a sip you watched as your tri-colored border collie, Molly, slowly walked to the back door. She took her paw and lightly scratched at the glass for you to let her out. The look she cast in your direction was somehow filled with attitude that you were taking too long. With a big smile you walked over and unlocked the door. You grabbed a towel off the shoe rack to wipe Molly off when she came back in but you noticed the rain had stopped. Before opening the door you flicked on the patio light and went to let her out. Looking up into the yard you let out a blood curdling scream.

Just like Evelyn had said, there was a man standing in your yard.

You couldn’t make out any defining details only that he was large, maybe bigger than John in stature. He was a shadowy figure standing about fifty yards from the tree line but still a good distance from your home. Your scream didn’t seem to scare him off but instead you watched as he began to slowly walk toward your home. Molly began barking like crazy and jumping on the back door for you to let her out and chase this man off.

“Darling!?” John could be heard racing down the stairs.

You caught sight of him running down the hall in the reflection of the glass backdoor. Shifting your focus you realized that the man in the yard must have seen John too because he was now running full sprint toward the forest.

John realized what was happening in seconds. He saw a figure darting into the woods and he was already springing into action. It had to be the years in the military that had made him so observant. It was why he spotted the man in seconds and picked up on the sinister feeling hanging in the air. It was the same unsettling ambience that filled war zones, compounds he was infiltrating, or the stiff air of a morgue.

“Stay right there and watch.” John ordered you before locking the door and then dashing into the basement.

In this moment you weren’t his wife needing protection, you were an extension of himself that needed to help protect. Your children were upstairs and it would take an army to get to them. John instinctively knew whoever was out there had to get through him and you; and you were a lot more scrappy than you appeared. John knew you’d move mountains for your children, that their safety was your number one priority much like him.

You didn’t respond, fear paralyzed you in this moment, but you did as you were told. Keeping your eyes on the man you watched as he faded into the darkness of the woods and stopped. The glow of your patio flood light stretched far enough it created long shadows that stretched across your property but didn’t reach the woods. His figure was like watching a tea bag bleed into water, you could make out distinct shapes until it all faded together. You could just make the man out; his figure was darker than the tree line. He was now standing just on the edge of the woods, staring directly at you and in seconds he faded together with the blackened shadows of the forest.

“Why’d you stop running?” You whispered and stepped closer to the glass.

Your breath was shallow and eyes squinted as you tried to focus on where you last saw the man. It didn’t make sense to you why he started for the house when it was you but then ran a moment later. Molly had stopped barking but was aggressively growling in the same direction you had your gaze fixed on.

“Oh. You can’t see John.” The words came out in a shaky whisper, your breath making the glass fog, obscuring the figure staring back at you.

That’s when you saw your husband. John was back by your side with his gun in hand. You realized he had also slipped on a camouflage rain coat, his tactical boots, and boonie hat. As soon as you saw John you realized the blackened shape you’d been staring at was gone.

“He went straight ahead.” Pointing off to show where you saw the man disappear to, John was soon sprinting in the same direction.

You hadn’t even realized he unlocked the backdoor until you saw the back of John and heard his boots stomp against the stone of your patio. Molly was right behind John which surprised you. She normally moved slow but she was sprinting with John and slowly outrunning him. She knew exactly where she was going and it made you wonder if she picked up on the unknown scent. The sound of Mollys bark snapped you out of your trance and you quickly shut the back door and locked it.

You then turned and ran upstairs for your children. There was no guarantee this man was alone and your worst fear would be for someone else to try breaking in while John was off chasing the accomplices. The first room you went to was your sons. Jj was sitting up in bed reading his book and snapped it shut when you burst through the door.

“I’m sorry! I’ll go to bed.” Jj immediately apologized not thinking he’d get caught staying up to read.

“Get Evelyn up and go to my bathroom. Don’t turn on any lights.” The urgency in your voice would scare most children but it didn’t have that effect on Jj.

The protocol was to bring the kids to the basement but you weren’t sure if someone was able to get in without you knowing. You were scared, petrified something was going to happen and you were the last line of defense to keep your children safe. This fear kept you from doing what you and John practiced.

It was like a switch flipped in Jj’s head as he slipped on his slippers and ran to Evelyn’s room. You were then in Lily’s bedroom and grabbed her. She was lying on her back talking to her stuffed animals and holding her penguin stuffy over her head. Any other night you’d watch her lovingly from the door and admire how cute Lily was.

“Mummy!” Lily gasped as she was snatched out of bed.

“Shhh. We’re playing hide and seek with daddy and we have to be very quiet.” You whispered to your daughter who seemingly believed you.

“Fun.” She giggled and kicked her feet as you ran to your room.

Locking the bedroom door behind you, you grabbed the blanket off the foot of your bed and then dashed into the bathroom. Evelyn and Jj were sitting in the bathtub which was exactly where you were going to tell them to sit. You took Lily and placed her in Jj’s lap. There was a silent understanding between you two that he was to look after his sisters.

“Stay quiet.” You smiled reassuringly to your little girls.

“Daddy will never find us.” Lily giggled.

“Perfect spot for hide and seek.” This was your attempt to get your kids on board with the lie you told Lily.

Giving each child a kiss to the tops of their heads you took the large plush blanket and made sure they were all covered up to stay warm. You pulled the curtain back to conceal where they were and rolled into your next move.

Making your way back into your bedroom you grabbed the skeleton key and locked the door. You wee locking your babies in the bathroom to keep them safe, god forbid something happened to you. Your next step was to grab the serrated Bowie knife John hid in the false bottom of his nightstand. It felt clinical how you moved. The underlying fear seemed to fade into the background as you did everything John had coached you to do.

Grabbing your cell phone you called the police first and then your father second. You placed one final call just in case John needed help in a different kind of way than the police could offer. The phone rang twice before the person answered clearly out of breath.

“Indy, kinda late-“

“Soap! I know you’re dating that girl- ugh- uh- what’s her name- uh- maybe if you didn’t sleep with so many of my friends I’d remember! The one with kids. Are you at her place?” You yelled and babbled out.

You could hear sheets rustling and a female voice asking something faintly in the background. The voice grew louder and more agitated but you didn’t care at the moment. Soap had been dating one of the moms at Lily’s daycare and she happened to live near by. You were praying he was at her place for the night.

“Yeah, everything alright? I’m kinda in the middle of s-”

“Some creep was standing outside the house and John chased him into the woods. I don’t know if he needs help-“ You were babbling again and hadn’t noticed you were crying.

“I’ll be there in five minutes.” Soap could be heard shuffling around quickly and you assumed he was getting dressed.

“Thank you! Flash your headlights so I know it’s you.”

“On my way.”

Those five minutes felt like an eternity. But soon enough you saw headlights pulling up your driveway and then they flashed four times. Seeing that it was Soap you slid the knife into the holster you had secured to the back of the waist band of your leggings. You left your bedroom and locked the door behind you. Jogging downstairs you met Soap on your patio.

Soap looked disheveled. His hair was sticking up in odd direction and he was flushed. You were use to seeing Soap in jeans but tonight he wore grey joggers that left nothing to the imagination. His grey crewneck had a lipstick smudge by the collar and what you assumed was red wine dribbled down the front. The only thing that made him look ready to help was the pistol in his hand and scuffed military boots.

“John took off that way with his gun, Molly followed too.” You pointed into the woods where John had ran off to.

“Alright, hold on to this.” Soap smacked a walkie talkie into your hand and the gun he was holding in the other.

You physically reacted to now holding a gun and held it as far away from you as you could manage. It looked like it grossed you out the way your face twisted in disgust. Soaps eyebrows scrunched together and he looked at the gun that you were acting like it was a dead animal he handed you.

“Don’t be scared of it. Just point and pull the trigger.” Soap took off running in the direction of your husband after he was done speaking.

You watched as he pulled out another gun from the back of his waist band and you wondered how many guns the members of 141 had hidden just in case they needed them. You knew John’s arsenal and were constantly on his case to get rid of some.

Before Soap even reached half way across the yard John was walking out of the woods with Molly following close behind. You couldn’t make out if he was okay from this distance but you noticed he was alone. Part of you thought he’d be dragging someone by the hair out of the woods or that he’d be covered in blood with a dead body slung over his shoulder.

“You get your hands on him Cap?” Soap called. He stopped halfway into your yard and waited for John to join him in walking back to your home.

You watched from the lit patio as the two conversed quietly. It made you wonder what information John was passing along. The two continued to quietly converse as they walked back over to you.

“Slippery fucker.” John cursed, his frustration evident.

“How’d he get away?” You heard Soap ask as you impatiently waited on the patio.

The night air bit at your exposed skin, making you shiver. Your bare feet were tingling against the cold stone. There was a pebble sticking to the bottom of one of your feet and uncomfortably pressing into your skin. Standing on one foot you picked it off with the hand holding the walkie talkie. You didn’t notice how by keeping your balance you were waving around your other hand.

“Woah, easy there. Don’t need you putting a hole in either of us.” John had both hands on you, one on your wrist and the other taking the gun from your hand. After you were disarmed John answered Soaps question.

“His car was parked on some trail deep in the woods. He took off before I could grab him. Molly took a bite out of him though.” Handing the gun back to Soap John cast another unimpressed look at you for your lack of gun safety. Soap knelt down and slipped the gun into a holster around his ankle.

“Really? Good girl.” You squatted down and gave Molly some much deserved scratches. You ignored John’s look, he knew your distain for guns. You checked Molly’s teeth and mouth to make sure she wasn’t hurt.

“I’ll be picking her up a steak tomorrow.” John patted her on the head and then she finally walked off to go pee like she originally had to.

“You broken?” You stopped John from walking by you and lightly took him by the shoulders. You used his phrase to hopefully dampen the tension. Looking him over you saw he was a bit muddy but not a scratch on him.

“Far from broken, darling.” You loved hearing those words and you swooned even harder when John placed a firm kiss to your forehead. Warping a strong arm around your waist John lead you inside and motioned for Soap to follow.

The three of you went inside and you went to grab your children. John told you he’d put a kettle on while you got everything back in order; including yourself. Somehow you managed to shove the fear crackling through your bones down and be the mother your children needed. You had them all back in bed easily and Jj was the only one to ask questions. He came to the conclusion that this was practice in case something bad ever happened. Just like the time you practiced what he and his sisters needed to do if there was ever a fire.

Once downstairs you could hear Soap and John talking. Your nerves were beginning to fray. Keeping it together for this long felt unnatural. You felt like a robot getting your kids back to bed. Cuddling Evelyn as she babbled about wanting to go to the park tomorrow, organizing Lily’s stuffed animals on the bed in your room to sleep with you, and telling Jj everything was alright; it was like an out of body experience. It was auto pilot to get them all settled and now finally you were coming back to your senses.

“Yeah, Indy called while I was mid thrust. Should’ve seen Saoirse’s face when I picked up the ph-“

“Charming.” You scrunched your nose at Soaps crass remark.

You weren’t one for dirty banter unless it was with John. It sounded like locker room talk to you which you disapproved of. You didn’t think John would normally entertain that kind of talk but Soap seemed comfortable talking like that.

“Sorry. Didn’t see you there.” Soap laughed awkwardly. You were giving him a disapproving look which had him feeling like a naughty school boy.

“That how you talk about me?” You asked John who snorted at the idea.

“Oh, I go into much more detail.” His joke wasn’t funny to you and he put his hands up in defense before you gave him a tongue lashing.

“I’m only joking.” John added.

“The kids are back in bed.” You changed the subject before you started questioning your husband.

You grabbed the cup of tea John prepared for you. The mug lightly swayed in your shaky hands as you brought the warm liquid to your mouth.

“You alright?” Soap asked. He was staring at you with concern and that was when you noticed John also looked worried.

“Not really. That was fucking scary.” As you spoke you noticed how your words were in a higher register and you stuttered slightly.

John was by your side now, one large hand lightly stroking your back. His other hand came up and pushed your hair out of your face and behind your ear. Leaning in he whispered in your ear that he loved you and you had nothing to worry about.

“Did you get a good look at him?” John asked once he pulled away.

“No. What’s weird is he started walking toward the house until he saw you. He ran but stopped at the edge of the woods when you went into the basement. It’s like he only stared when he knew you couldn’t see him. . . Like he knew I couldn’t defend myself.” The last sentence came out breathy and you gritted your teeth at the realization.

“Well I’m here to stay. So if I’m what scares him off then he won’t be coming ‘round again.” John spoke adamantly. His hand went from stroking your back to gripping your hip and bringing you close. John had you tucked under his arm and by his side, firmly in his hold.

“Think Evie got a good look?” You asked which made John frown down at you.

“Feel like a fool for not believing her.” He ran his free hand ran down his face.

“Me too. We owe her an apology.” You placed your face in your hands feeling like an absolute idiot.

“Oh and would’ya look at that. Police thirty minutes late like usual.” Soap scoffed.

——————

It was an early Friday morning with the suns orange hues streaming through the windows of your kitchen. Breakfast was laid out on the table. A plate of eggs, bowl of beans, toast, sautéed mushrooms, and cut up fruit sat already picked over. Jj was scraping the last of the beans onto his plate with his tongue poking out of the corner of his mouth. Lily had her open mouth pressed up to the side of her plate as he shoveled her eggs into her mouth that way. Before this method of eating, her eggs kept falling off her fork and made a mess on the floor that Molly was cleaning up.

“Do you have to go?” Lily asked with a mouth full of her breakfast.

Evelyn was wrapped around John’s leg like she had been for the past half hour. She was sat on his foot with her legs tight wound around his calf and arms locked around his knee. John didn’t say much about it but instead hobbled around the first floor with her attached to him. Usually if he allowed her to act out or be on the difficult side it made saying goodbye easier. John wasn’t sure why but you told him it’s because it made her feel important. That even when she was being difficult she felt the extra love with his patience.

“Yes. I’ll only be gone the weekend.” John reassured Lily who frowned at him.

“But there’s a new episode of Bluey.” She protested. A big pout formed on her face since John wouldn’t be here to watch it with her.

“We can watch it together when I get back.” John chuckled.

He found it cute that a new episode of Bluey should be enough for him to call out of work. Hobbling by you John started to help you finish up cleaning the kitchen.

“Not fair.” Lily mumbled.

“Don’t worry Lil, you’ll get use to dad having to jet off randomly.” Jj thought he was reassuring his little sister but it was like daggers to John’s heart.

John audibly scoffed, face dropping and looking to you for comfort. You only shrugged not knowing what to say. Jj was right in a sense but to you it was something you had still never gotten use to. You went back to your task ignoring your husband’s silent plea for reassurance.

“You okay over there?” John asked, you were taking up bread making and kneading the life out of some dough.

“Fine.” You mused not looking at John.

You were taking out your anxiety on this pour ball of dough. At this rate you were going to bake the world’s densest loaf of bread. All because you couldn’t stomach John being gone for the weekend.

“Soap’s going to be five minutes away. Whatever that was last week was just a freak one off. It’s been resolved with some handcuffs.” John tried out humor which didn’t seem to work. You simply kneaded harder and blew the fallen strands of hair out of your face.

“How are you so sure of that?” It was almost inaudible as you were snarky back. John had spent hours at this point reassuring you everything would be okay.

“Darling, we left my car on base for two nights in a row to make it look like I wasn’t home and there was nothing. I stayed up both nights on lookout.” John had hobbled over to you to try and get you to look at him.

You continued your task, ignoring the burn in your arms.

“The neighbor was arrested. We saw him getting arrested two days ago on our run. Remember?” Taking his index finger John hooked it under your chin and turned your head to look at him. His eyes were kind but he was met with a scowl from you.

“Yeah I remember.” You sighed. This didn’t quell your anxiety.

In fact it made you more uneasy that John was so sure. Your gut told you something was still wrong and John dismissed it as nerves. You two had been bickering about you trusting his judgment and you telling him to trust your intuition.

“Yeah! The policeman who doesn’t like our chickens was there!” Lily exclaimed as she told Jj details to a story he’d already heard. Jj looked back at his little sister with a dead pan expression, he was annoyed at her constant repeating as of late.

“Yeah? Was dad pushing you in the stroller since you’re such a big baby you didn’t wanna stay here with papa?” Jj’s retort had Lily’s lip wobbling.

She had thrown an absolute fit about wanting to join you and John on your run. John gave in and popped her in the stroller and took her along with the two of you that day. Lily got a front row seat to the neighbors arrest. You and John watched everything unfold along with some fellow neighbors.

“I’m not a baby!” Lily shouted back.

“Yeah? News to me.” With an eye roll Jj went back to eating.

“Mummy!” Lily shrieked unable to deal with her brother’s curtness.

“Jj.” You and John both used a stern tone as you warned Jj to knock it off.

“Sorry. Sorry. Let’s all pretend she’s not a big cry baby who always gets her way. I use to think Evie was a brat but Lily takes the cake.” The sass was getting on your nerves and before you or John could reprimand the attitude Jj was getting up.

“I’ll go to my room. It’s worth saying the truth.” He huffed and brought his plate to the sink.

“And-“ John started but Jj cut in again.

“I’ll put the switch on your bed don’t worry.” You couldn’t see him at this point because he was halfway down the hall but you could tell by his tone he rolled his eyes.

“What are we gonna do with him?” John looked at you dumbstruck. You ignored his question and went back to what was weighing on your mind.

“Maybe me and the kids should stay with my dad.” You suggested.

“Would that make you feel better? You can come back during the day, you I’ll get the house to yourself for a few hours.” John rolled right back into the conversation from before. Your comfort was much more important than his preteens rudeness.

“Doesn’t sound half bad.” The idea of having the house to yourself was too good to pass up on. Being here by yourself during the day didn’t feel scary.

“So you want to get rid of us!?” Evelyn accused you from where she sat on the floor still hugging John’s leg.

“We’d sell you if it wasn’t illegal.” John joked which made Evelyn gasp.

“C’mon they’d return them all by sundown.” You added on with a laugh. This seemed to rile up your oldest daughter.

“Good! At least someone would take me cuz no one’s gonna want a stinky old man! And they’d give Lily back for being such a cry baby!” Evelyn hissed. Your eyebrows scrunched together at the shot taken at Lily was was minding her own business. You looked up to see her with her mouth agape like a trout and a strawberry in hand.

“I’m not old.” John said with a straight face.

“I’m not a baby!” Lily shouted.

“Stop it. I don’t know why you and your bother are teasing your sister but it’s enough.” You warned.

“Evie. Say I’m not a baby.” Lily whined. Evelyn rolled her eyes and tossed her head back.

“You’re not a baby.” Evelyn groaned. She only said it so Lily wouldn’t cry. That seemed to be enough for Lily who went back to eating.

“I have to make sure my dad’s free.” You said while shaking your head at your children’s antics

“Why wouldn’t he be? That posh lady broke up with him.” Evelyn was staring up at you, still wrapped around John’s leg.

“Cold, Evelyn.” You laughed.

Your father dating history had been a slew of women who you thought were lack luster. John tried to get you to give them a chance but you brushed him off saying they would never stick around long.

“Now go sit.” Finally you ushered Evelyn off of John and over to the kitchen table to eat her cold breakfast.

“Fine.” Evelyn let go of John and stomped over to the table.

“Darling it’ll be okay.” John who was now able to move around freely and came up behind you and wrapped you in his arms. Those large rough hands you loved so much slid down your arms until his hands encompassed yours. Slowly moving them away from the bread dough, John’s breath was now in your ear.

“Yeah?” You softly asked.

John was going against his better judgment as he told you this. He felt safe and assured that nothing would happen. The problem had been taken care of and there was no way your neighbor was getting out of jail while he was away. John had looked into the charges and chose to keep them to himself but with how worried you seemed it was time to share.

“Look, neighbors been arrested for violating a restraining order of a woman he was stalking. It wasn’t the only restraining order he had put against him. He’s not around to do anything.” John spoke softly, wrapping his arms back around you and hugging you close to his chest.

“John, Officer Parker said it’s not him.” Turning your head to the side you looked up at John who wore a crooked smile.

“You really trust the police to do a good job?” The question hung in the air longer than you liked. You weren’t sure what your answer should be or if you even agreed with John’s sentiment.

“Anyway, I’ll have Soap check in on you throughout the day.” Letting you go John shrugged and gave you a kiss to the cheek, his beard leaving behind the usual scratchy feeling.

“So you’re not convinced it’s the nephew!?” Whipping around you had your finger in John’s face. He chuckled deeply and moved your hand back down to your side.

“I am convinced, you’re the one who’s not. But you know me darling. Not one to take chances when it comes to something as precious as you and the kids.” John was being sweetly flirtatious and you weren’t sure if you should blush or get him to be more serious.

“Well, I still have to call my dad. I’d feel okay if Soap was here for the weekend while you’re away-if my dad’s busy.” The thought of Soap spending the weekend finally quelled the anxiety that had taken root in your chest. Soap would keep you and your children safe, you were sure of that.

“Well he’s not staying here. The man can barely keep it in his pants as is, and I don’t need you falling for whatever charm he has that makes women flock to him in droves.” Talking with his hands John then shook his head in what seemed to be frustration and went to grab something from the fridge.

“John.” You whined at his reasoning.

“Stay with your dad and come by in the morning. You’ll get to enjoy the house to yourself. I’ll have Soap stop by in the morning and then see you off mid afternoon.” John’s mind was made up on how things would go and you could only roll your eyes at him.

“A lot of precautions for someone who thinks I’m safe.” You muttered.

“I know you’re safe but you wouldn’t be able to sleep unless I did all this.” Kissing your temple John grabbed a tub of ice cream and popped the lid off. Before you could move John snatched you around the waist and purred in your ear.

“Let’s send the kids to your dad’s tonight and you can show me how much you’ll miss me.” John flirted.

You rolled your eyes with a giggle and grabbed spoons. John was right and you would’ve bugged him to do all this but he had beaten you to it. With it just being you home you didn’t see the harm. It would be nice to have the house to yourself.

“And stop rolling your eyes. You wonder why the kids do it when they’re giving us attitude.” It sounded playful with a twist of seriousness and you subconsciously rolled your eyes again. This earned a firm smack to your bottom.

——————

“Hey, I miss you and clearly you miss me too. The flowers are beautiful. Who’d you get to drop them off? Ended up staying at your sisters last night, had too much wine to drive to my dads. Anyway got here pretty early and slept off the hangover. I didn’t even hear who stopped by with the flowers cuz I slept in for once. Ha! Crazy huh? Me sleeping in. Feels like a dream. Welp, I miss you and can’t wait to see you on Monday. Be safe and come back in one piece. I love you John.” You hung up, wondering when John would get a chance to check his voicemail.

You loved leaving him long winded voicemails. The first time you ever did it was when you were dating. John gushed about it on the way home from you picking him up from the airport. He went on and on about how hard it was to not get to talk to you when he wanted, so to have a voicemail where it was like having a conversation made everything feel better. So you never stopped doing it and whenever John called back he prattled on like the conversation was fresh and not hours, days, or weeks old.

The roses on the kitchen counter were gorgeous which was what spurred on that voicemail. Long stemmed and in the vase you inherited from your mother. It was a Persian blue vase that was portrayed in one of your mother’s painting hanging up in your bedroom.

Cocking your head to the side you stared at the vase for a minute longer. Something was prying at your mind, something unsettling. This vase was suppose to be in your office. You had it put away, packaged neatly and safely so it could never be damaged. That was the entire point of why the painting was hung up. So you could still see it but not risk it ever being broken.

You couldn’t remember if you told John where you had put it. It was making you wonder if he had gone through your office to find it. But why would he do that, when John knew not to take this out considering the last time he brought out one of your mother’s vases it was shattered by mistake.

Reaching forward you plaid with one of the fallen rose petals on the counter. Your mind was stuck on the Persian blue vase. No way were these delivered by an outside source. There was no way a stranger could get into your home. So it had to be someone you knew. John would never ask any of his family members to go rifling through your office. Maybe Soap was the one to drop them off when he checked on you this morning, but still why would he go in your office. The only person John would ever ask to do that was your father.

So, you called your dad.

“Hey, why didn’t you stay for breakfast? Hope taking mums vase out didn’t upset you. I know how certain things of hers hurt a little bit more than others. Anyway, thanks for doing that so John could surprise me. Call me back.” Hanging up you eye’d the flowers one more time before going to make yourself breakfast.

Your day continued from there. It was nice having the house to yourself. It almost never happened so when you found yourself eating junk food all day while watching tv you decided you had to do at least one productive thing. Soap had stopped by again and told you he’d be seeing you off around 5. Around dinner time you had just finished throwing a load of laundry in when your phone rang.

A large grin spread across your face. Illuminated on your phone screen was a picture of John looking content. He was buried in the sand from his waist down with a margarita in hand and wearing his boonie hat. It was from your last holiday abroad and like every beach vacation he let the kids bury him in the sand. It was a ploy to tire them out, not have to run around with them, and get his drinks served directly to him.

“Hey-“

“What flowers?” John’s voice was deadly serious.

You were a bit taken aback. You were expecting charm, or a flirty greeting. Instead you got demanding words that made you feel weightless for a second.

“Uh, there’s flowers on the kitchen island. Roses to be specific, the long stem that I like. Th-they’re in my mums blue vase that I keep in my office.” You stuttered a bit.

There was this feeling of dread taking over. Maybe John forgot he told your dad to do this. Or maybe your dad just did it to be sweet and you should call him again to check. Soap could’ve done it and John pulled out the vas before he left. John calling you and sounding so serious was raising the alarm bells in your head.

“Darling, I didn’t order you flowers.” John sounded even, almost too calm.

You gulped down the rock forming in your throat. There had to be an explanation. John said you were safe, you believed you were safe. Soap checked up on you twice today, how could you be anything but safe.

“Maybe my dad stopped by-“

“He has the kids. You really think they wouldn’t have come and woke you up?” John’s words were making your head feel staticky.

“Who put them there?” You whispered.

Your heart was beating so loud it was making your ears ring. You stepped out into the kitchen for a moment and looked to see if anything else was out of place. The setting sun was casting scattered hues of purples and oranges across your colorful kitchen.

Your eyes slowly moved over the room and stopped at the roses standing tall in the center of the kitchen island. The way your head moved felt like a magnet slowly pulling you to look at the slightly ajar basement door. The whites of your eyes felt dry as you stared at it, phone pressed to your ear and hand shaking. That door had been closed all day and no one but you was home to open it.

“Where are you?” John’s thick voice interpreted your thoughts. Taking a step back into the laundry room you slowly started to shut the door.

“The laundry room. Th-the basement door- it- it’s crack-ed.” You whispered.

“Lock the doors and stay in there. There’s a tool box on the shelf above the dryer. I hid a knife in there, grab it. Soap will be there soon. I’m going to call you right back.” John spoke to you calmly to hopefully keep you from freaking out.

This was a situation that had his heart about to leap out of his throat. The fact he wasn’t there to handle whatever was happening terrified him. He could only imagine the fear you were facing being home alone with a possible threat in your home.

“Shouldn’t I hide in my office like we’ve planned? Maybe I opened the door and just forgot? I can be forgetful! I-I must have done it!” This was always the plan if anything bad happened. It was to hide in your office. You couldn’t come to terms with the truth staring you straight in the face.

“No. Stay exactly where you are and do what I said. Soap will be there soon.” John spoke forcefully this time. With the facts presented to him he had a good idea what would play out if you went down those basement stairs.

“J-John.” His name came out in a broken sob.

John could hear you fumbling around as quietly as you could. The sound of the toolbox rattling from your shaky hands had his heart beating faster. Your ragged breathing was blowing the speaker out and light sniffles were audible.

“Yes?” John asked.

“I love you.” You spoke with desperation and John could hear it in your voice.

“I love you too. I’ll call right back. Hold tight.” John kept composed for you and your sanity.

You weren’t sure how much time passed. All you knew is it was enough for you to lock yourself in the laundry room, grab the switch blade, and squat in the corner like a cowering animal.

Your phone buzzed and you saw it was John.

“John- I’m scared.”

“It’s okay. Soaps a few minutes away.” The gravely tone of Jones voice helped you feel safe for a brief moment until you realized he was still over seas. It was a hard pill to swallow that John wasn’t near by to protect you. You trusted Soap but no one would fight for you the way John would.

“Who could’ve- why would they- how’d they know about my mums vase? Where I put it? What it means to me?” You babbled out.

“Darling, I’m going to be honest with you-“ John paused and you heard him taking a deep breath.

“I think he’s in the house and I think it’s someone you know personally.” John’s words had you straightening with a chill running up your spine. It felt like you were going to be sick.

“H-how? Where?” You asked.

“I don’t know. . . but I think your office. Why else would the vase be out if not to have you go downstairs and check on things.” John seemed rushed as he explained his reasoning. He didn’t want you to be anymore scared than you originally were but he wanted you to be prepared for the worst.

“When are you coming home?” You began to weep down the line. Pathetic sobs echoed down the line turning John’s rage white hot.

“Making arrangements as soon as Soap gets there.” John spoke to no response. All he could hear were your quiet fearful sobs on the line.

You weren’t sure why you did it but you crawled over to the door that led to your kitchen. Unlocking it with shaky hands, you cracked it open the tiniest bit. The kitchen table sat between the laundry room and basement door. But you could just peer through the chair and table legs to see the door still ajar.

Your heart stopped in that moment. In the orange glow of the setting sun you saw one eye so dark it looked black staring right at you. Unblinking and with a vacant stare the one eye watched you in such a predatory way you couldn’t look away. Terror had clutched so tightly it stole the air from your lungs. You could make out just the edge of a nose with pale skin, sunken eye so wide it was unnatural, and in this moment you had never been more scared in your life. Your bladder gave out and you stared back as you looked death in the eye.

“Darling? Are you okay?” John asked once he heard your ragged breathing stop.

Not taking your eyes off the person staring at you, you shut the door and locked it again. You were dead, there was no making it out of this alive. And in the moment where fear should be the most prevalent it washed away like the tide on the shore. Clutching the knife firmly in your hand you gritted your teeth and prepared yourself to fight for your life.

“Someone’s in the basement. I opened the laundry room door for a second to see if the coast was clear and he was staring back at me from the bottom corner of the door.” The calmness spooked even your husband.

It was not a fault of yours but in moments of fight or flight you tended to freeze up. So to hear you so calm like you were ready to brave the storm sent shivers through John’s body. You clearly knew how much worse this was than he did.

Knocking sounded on the side door of the laundry room that lead out to the drive way. You clamped your hand over your mouth to keep yourself from screaming. Breathing out through your nose with eyes bugging out of your head you scrambled for it. On your feet you went to fling the door open but stoped yourself. You had no idea who was on the other side, you’d assumed it was Soap.

“Indy, it’s me. Open up.” The familiar sound of Soaps voice made you gasp.

Flinging the door open Soap stood there dressed in jeans and a black t-shirt. His hair was neatly done and he stared back at you with an even expression. There was that look in his eyes that John would get at times that you could never quite name. To you seemed animalistic, like a need to kill.

Soap took in the sight of you. Bleary eyed, sweating like you’d run a marathon, and a dark wet patch running down your left leg. You were petrified, unable to find words and you simply shook and stepped out on to the driveway.

“C’mon, in the car now.” In one fluid motion Soap had taken the knife from your hands and had you by the elbow.

He lead you quickly and firmly over to his truck and opened the door and practically shoved you in. Soap was at the drivers side in a flash and soon was peeling out of your driveway. With one hand on the wheel Soap began to search around for something in the back seat until he pulled out a pair of his sweat pants and handed them to you.

“Put those on and chuck the ones you’ve got on in the back.” Soap focused on the road his knuckles turning white as he gripped the steering wheel.

The boys in 141 had become rather protective of you, each in their own ways. Having known you for this long you’d created a friendship with them. But after seeing you kidnapped and Soap being the one to find you and carry you out, he had become particularly protective.

“I won’t look.” He added but that didn’t seem to matter to you.

You were already shucking off your soiled jeans and panties and sliding into Soaps grey sweatpants. You noticed how soft they felt and they smelled of lavender making you wonder if his new girlfriend had washed them for him. It was a nice distracting thought from the panic setting your skin ablaze.

“You alright?” Soap asked and then looked at you.

He’d forgotten how he said he would not look and accidentally saw half your bare ass as you slid his sweatpants on. It was obvious you were not alright. Your hair was a mess, eyes bloodshot and puffy, and teeth bared as you held back what seemed to be sobs. Soap was astonished by your ability to hold yourself together. You were safe now and still trying to be strong.

“He-he’s in the h-Ouse.” It felt like acid spewed from your mouth as you said those words.

“Ghost is almost there and he’ll be searching your home.” Soap spoke and placed a hand on your knee as a way to comfort you.

It was that touch that had everything crashing down. The image of the unblinking eye staring back at you was seared into your minds eye. Your trembling hands started to shake violently and your head was spinning.

“Soap, pull over.” You gasped and began coughing.

“What, why?” Soaps head snapped to look at you like you were crazy. You were on a busy road it wasn’t particularly safe to pull over.

“I’m gonna be sick.” You clamped your hand over your mouth as you felt your stomach about to betray you.

Soap immediately pulled off to the side of the road. He watched as you practically tumbled out of the passenger seat and were profusely sick. It was a shock to him that this was enough to get you reacting like that. You wouldn’t last a minute with 141 if this is how you handled stress. But then it started to occur to him that you were a civilian. This wasn’t something you knew how to handle or could compartmentalize.

It started to make sense to Soap why your youngest, Lily, was so sensitive. Soap always wondered who she got it from or if it was just how Lily was. That incredibly friendly and confident demeanor you had did not help you under stress. In fact you were a bit of an anxious wreck under pressure and Lily was too. Soap didn’t know but you had reacted the same way Lily did when John yelled at her. Only you were staring death in the face.

Getting back in to the car with watery eyes you nodded at Soap to keep driving. You felt somewhat better after being sick. That didn’t stop the tears from flowing as you continued to cry.

“You okay?” Soap had no idea how to comfort you, he never really knew what to do when a woman started crying. John warned him you would be a whirlwind but this was a lot more than Soap could understand.

“No.” You sobbed into your hands.

“It’ll be okay.” Soap sounded unsure but it was more from your emotional reaction.

“I just- I can’t stop thinking what would’ve happened if I didn’t send the kids for a sleep over with my dad.” You wailed, absolutely inconsolable.

Things would have been different if your children were home. You didn’t know what you would’ve done if you were attacked while they were home. Or if one of them went into the basement without you knowing. There was no doubt in your mind you would have ended up dead with the kids home. That Jj would’ve had to take his sisters and run while you fought to give them a head start.

“I- I don’t know. But you would’ve kept them safe.” Soap didn’t sound like he believed himself and you weren’t sure you did either.

You versus a man the size of John. A man who out ran your husband, took a dog bite like it was nothing and got away. Yes, you would’ve fought with every fiber of your being to keep your children safe; but would you have actually been able to fight him off and keep your children safe?

“I’m gonna be sick again.”

——————

Soap had taken you to Ghost and Dove’s house after picking you up. It was a complete shit show when you walked through their front door. Dove immediately brought you to her room where you had a panic attack and ended up crying in her arms. At one point she excused herself and you thought it was to attend to her children. You showered and she gave you some clothes to wear.

You were there for hours, the night sky had taken over and midnight approached. You hadn’t heard from John but Soap informed you he was to stay by your side at all times; it was ‘Captains orders.’ You had calmed down significantly with Dove’s help. It reminded you why she was such a huge asset to 141 during the time she served with them years ago. Ghost had mentioned her proclivity in calming down prisoners of war and she was truly your godsend.

You were sitting at her circular kitchen table having tea with her and Soap. Food wasn’t appealing so you ignored her insistence on your eating something. Soap ate enough for the two of you which was a pleasant distraction. You had called your dad and wished each one of your children goodnight. It was the only solace you could find in the situation and you cried over the picture of all three of them asleep in the guest bed at your father’s flat.

It seemed that things had finally cooled down for you. That the world wasn’t crashing down anymore. Dove and Soap both assured you Simon had things handled and to just give it time. So that was what you did until he walked through his back door dressed in all black with his balaclava on.

“Ghost! What happened was everything-“ You were standing up ready to ask a million questions. Dove was quick to stand with you and place her hand on your shoulder to keep you calm.

“Did you go into your basement at all during the day?” Simon asked which instantly put you on edge.

“Uh- no. No I hung around the first floor all day. I-I saw someone some-some psycho staring at me through the cracked basement door right before Soap got me.” You words tumbled out and you were shaking all over again. You would never be able to get that image out of your head.

“Soap, cmon, need your help.” And with that Simon was exiting and heading back to his truck. That wasn’t enough for you. You shrugged Dove off and dashed outside to confront Simon.

“Wait what happened!? W-was the guy in my office!” You demanded. Simon turned on his heels, startling you at his quick movement.

You jumped backward and coward at his hulking frame, flinching as if he were about to strike you. Simon faltered for a moment seeing you like this. He was use to seeing you as a spitfire who loved giving him a hard time. Now wasn’t the time for him to pretend like he didn’t like you. In fact some softness for once was in order and he realized that. Placing a hand gingerly on your shoulder it was a surprise to you he could have such a gentle touch. You assumed everything he grasped would crack and crumble beneath his grip.

“There’s nothing you need to worry about now. Get some rest, no one will be bothering you again.” Ghost spoke with such certainty it made you know exactly what he meant without him actually saying it.

“What’s that suppose to mean?” With a trembling lip you watched as Simon shook his head in conformation to the silent question hanging in the air.

“C’mon Indy, I set up the couch for you.” Dove grabbed your hand a moment later and lead you inside to sleep for the night.

——————

Wheezing metal, thudding of belonging against the truck bed, and tires snapping twigs and branches underneath the weight of three murderous men cut through the heavy air. The night was pitch black, the only light being the yellow glow of the trucks headlights. Ghost and Soap were taking John Price out into the woods.

“How the hell did he get past you?” John seemed aggravated with Soap.

John hadn’t even stopped in to see you. He headed straight here once his boots touched home soil. Dove assured John you were safe and okay. As much as it pained him, John knew you could wait while he finished handling things.

“Flowers weren’t there when I checked on her in the morning. We only talked on your front porch that afternoon and she was getting ready to head out after she did some laundry. Never brought up the flowers.” Simon wasn’t happy with Soaps response.

“Doesn’t fucking matter. You should have checked the house.” Simon snapped aggressively.

“She told me not to worry. That it would be indecent for me to come in. Not sure why.” Soap answered matter of factly.

John knew why you’d told Soap not to worry. You were getting your own alone time which had included some delicate items left out on your bed that you were embarrassed for Soap to see. So you sent him away not thinking much of it and protecting your privacy.

“She wouldn’t have let Soap search the house. So drop it.” John wasn’t going to get into it. It was obvious enough in his mind and he didn’t see any reason to humiliate you more than you currently felt.

“When I got there the power was cut. Would have forced her down to the basement to fiddle with the circuit breakers.” Ghost continued the tone of his voice menacing. It was clear he was wound up by the events although he kept his composure.

“He really wanted her to stumble upon him.” John muttered.

John hated that you saw the man in your home. That you were so petrified you wet yourself in fear and he witnessed that. This stranger got exactly what he wanted and it was to see you scared for your life.

“Think he got off on her being terrified. And finding a man in the basement when she’s all alone would’ve been the most terrifying thing for her.” Soap added.

“Had a black duffle bag filled with things he was planning on using. He hadn’t realized she fled out the side door. He was searching for her when I got there. Humming some tune and calling her by name. . . Doing creepy fucking shit to scare her.” Ghost explained.

Knowing this man was lurking around your house and playing out his sick and twisted fantasy was making John’s face twitch. His anger was palpable and made the truck feel suffocating. It sounded like one of those horror movies you two occasionally watched. Only this time you had almost lived it.

“Duffle bag?” John was seething at this point. He could only image what kind of tools someone so depraved would bring along.

“I disposed of everything. Besides this and his journal.” Ghost handed over a prescription bottle of little blue pills and that was all John needed to know what the man’s intentions were.

It was more than to scare you. It was to do unspeakable things, torture you, and leave you for dead.

John had suspected that this was someone you knew personally. Someone who would be able to find out small details about you and it seem innocuous. John had been wracking his brain on who it could be and his mind kept sticking to one person in particular. One person who’d been snooping around his home in broad daylight and no one thought twice about.

Then John read the name on the bottle and all his suspicions were confirmed.

“We know him. It’s the fuckin’ cop that’s been sniffing around.” John whispered as he gripped the orange plastic so tightly it creaked against his hand.

“Knew.” Was all Ghost said.

“Ya’ killed a fuckin’ cop.” Soap scoffed while shaking his head.

“How’d you do it?” John asked looking from Simon to Soap.

The assumption was the two men took care of it together. That they made him suffer because that’s what John would have preferred. In the end John felt robbed. That he had his opportunity to take his rage out on the perpetrator stolen. John would’ve had him begging for death and that still wouldn’t have been enough for him.

“It was done when I got there.” Soap nodded to Simon. Rolling his shoulder back Simon kept his eyes fixed on the dirt path he drove down in the dead of night.

“Execution style. Let him know he was lucky for that. If it had been you who found him he’d be begging for a bullet.” Simon practically spat the words out, his disgust evident as he spoke about a man he found vile.

“So you’re taking me to him?” John asked with a sigh.

It wasn’t Simon’s fault he couldn’t keep the man alive for him. John saw that Ghost had secured you and your kids safety by ending it quick and easy. There was no longer a threat and you all could sleep easy.

“Thought it best you know all the details Cap.” Soap leaned forward as he spoke and then pointed to the dry birch tree off to the side of the path.

“Here.” Ghost parked the truck and didnt wait to get out.

The three men piled out and stayed silent as Soap lead them through the woods and Simon covered their tracks. Even if someone found the body it wouldn’t be identifiable or traced back to any of them. About two miles off the beaten path they arrived to the spot where Simon carried out his mercy kill.

There was a freshly disturbed plot of dirt with ruffage and leaves thrown over top. Looking to Soap and then Ghost, no words needed to be exchanged. This was where the man who would’ve done unspeakable things to you lay six feet under.

Walking over to the spot where this man had been laid to rest Soap and Ghost wondered what Price would do. All they could see was his back as his shoulder rolled back and he fiddled with something at waist level. Soon they could hear the clink of metal from John’s belt and then a steady stream.

Sharing a look Soap scoffed darkly and Ghost stayed eerily silent. Soap had no idea what he would’ve done in this situation if he were John, all he knew was the man had every right to lose his mind but wasn’t. His reaction was to piss on the man’s grave and Soap couldn’t blame him for that.

Ghost commended Price for keeping his cool. If the rolls were reversed Simon would has lost his grip. If anyone ever threatened his wife and entered his home where his children rested their heads at night Simon would light the world ablaze in his wrath.

“A bullet was too kind, Simon.” The words were growled over the sound of John’s belt clinking once more as he fastened it.

“Saving him for you wasn’t an option.” Simon spoke evenly.

“Lucky bastard.” Was all John said before heading back to the truck.

——————

It was late when John finally returned home. Your children were all tucked into bed and Gaz had said his goodbyes to his captain. Gaz had told him you went to bed a few hours ago and he hadn’t heard anything since. John was expecting to walk into the room with you fast asleep. But when he stepped through your bedroom door he was immediately met with you flinging yourself into his arms.

“Tell me everything’s okay. Tell me it’s over with and the guys arrested.” You babbled as your embrace grew tighter and tighter.

John was showing now signs of letting you go and you wanted to be held until all these horrible feelings went away. You wanted to be so close to him that you could crawl under his skin and set up camp. Melding into him was the only way to fell better. Maybe he could wear you as a backpack so you didn’t have to let go. You were starting to understand why Evelyn wrapped herself around John’s leg the other day. Something about not having to let go and John being okay with it left you feeling cared for and protected.

“He’s dealt with.” John tried to reassure you.

Without thinking and acting naturally John picked you up and you responded by wrapping your legs around his waist. John brought you over to your shared bed and plopped down on his side so you were laying on your back and he was pressing you into the mattress.

“Like dead?” You pushed John off you by the shoulder. Now with both hands on either side of your head he stared down at you. His face was emotionless as he kept his composure which wasn’t reassuring to the question you just asked.

“Darling-“ John was cut off by you sitting up and staring at him confused and unsure. You were sitting criss cross on the bed while John sat up straight with his feet on the floor.

“Is the guy dead John? Did Ghost kill him? Did you kill him!?” The questions rolled of your tongue.

John stared at you with a serious expression. You didn’t need him to answer to know the man was most likely dead. You came to that conclusion quickly just by the way John was acting.

“John did you kill him?” You asked again.

“No.” He said adamantly. You took a breath realizing what this meant.

“So Ghost did?” You shook your head to see if John would mimic you and silently admit to it; but he didn’t.

John didn’t answer this time. He turned his gaze to your open bedroom door and stared out into the dark hallway. The lack of response had you panicking in a whole new way. Before John knew it you were standing and shutting the door then frantically pacing.

“Okay. Okay. Oh fuck. That’s bad John. That’s really bad.” Your fingers were in your hair as you began to nervously tidy your room. John watched you pace and pick up the pile of clothes on the floor and then start fiddling with things on your dresser.

“Nothing happened. All you need to know is he won’t be bugging our family again.” John spoke evenly but was becoming stressed by your pacing and how you nervously tidied the room.

“I think I’m going to be sick.” You stopped in your tracks as your mind came up with vicious scenarios.

Had Ghost stumbled upon something so depraved that it drove him to murder this stranger in your home. Then you started to freak out. Was someone murdered in your home? Were the police going to come for you and John as accomplices? Would Ghost be arrested for murder and miss out on his family all because of you?

“Sit, it’s okay.” John guided you to sit on the foot of your bed. You had stopped babbling and pacing but now you were staring blankly off into space which worried John more than the nervousness.

“Does Dove know?” Your head snapped up realizing Simon’s wife would probably fall apart at the news.

If you found out John killed someone on your behalf you weren’t sure you’d be able to recover from the shock. You would constantly be worrying about him being arrested or someone coming after him. There would be a worry that the guilt would eat him alive. Although, little did you know murder was hardly off the table for John. He found that he could live quite comfortably with a guilty conscious on that front.

John took a moment before speaking. He was trying to weigh if the truth was worth you knowing. Ultimately he decided being honest was better and would hopefully create more of an understanding between you two. It was an attempt to get you closer to his way of thinking and that violence was in fact was a solution for some scenarios.

“In for a penny, I guess. . . It was her idea.” John’s words shook you to your core.

“Am I just surrounded by crazy? What kind of example are we setting for our kids.” You placed your face in yours hands.

John knew this was going to be hard for you to understand. As a person who had never seen war but experience violence and came out of it still not wishing death upon anyone, you would struggle to accept things. You had been kidnapped once and beat to a pulp and you had never truly recovered from that mentally. John couldn’t tell you the true danger you were in, for fear you’d live you life scared. That the man who waited for you in your basement had despicable plans for you for days and your survival would have left you so damaged John wondered if you would have chosen death instead. And that was without your children home. The whole situation was John’s worst nightmare but the thought that your little girls and son could have been subject to such cruelty made John’s blood run cold.

“I’m going to be candid with you. That man had horrible things planned for you. God only knows what he had planned if Jj, Evelyn, and Lily were home with you, love.” John took a deep breath before continuing.

“Simon made a choice where the outcome guaranteed your safety, the kids safety. That there would be no chance of it happening again or the law failing us.” Placing his hand on your shoulder John wasn’t sure if you were convinced. He was crouched in front of you now and hoping by some miracle you’d be okay with this.

“He made the right choice. I respect his decision.” John spoke as if it were fact. It was his way of egging you on for a reaction. It was killing him seeing you silently sitting on the foot of your bed with your face in your hands.

“How do we begin to thank him? I’ve never owed someone my life before.” Your attempt at humor came off dry and unfunny but John knew you were trying to come around to this idea.

“See it as him and I are even.” John chuckled with no humor and nodded to you as a silent thanks for not freaking out.

“You would’ve done the same?” You asked hoping that John’s response would somehow make this less morally confusing.

“Without a second thought. If someone threatened Dove and her kids the way you were-“ John had to pause as he realized he was growling the words and sounded as if he was losing his grip.

“Well, I’ll let you use your imagination on what I would’ve done.” He forced a smile and hated how you were staring at him as if he had a few screws loose.

Taking a breath you were convincing yourself this was fine. It had to be fine because this was the truth and you’d have to keep on living your life one way or another. At the end of the day the kids were safe and you wouldn’t have to worry about anything like this again.

“Do I bake him a cake?” You looked at John seriously.

The fact you meant what you were asking made John snort out a laugh. He wasn’t sure if you were sweet for that or a bit off your rocker.

“Don’t laugh at me.” You snapped.

“I don’t think he expects a cake, darling. If he did our yard would be fertilized with the blood of his enemies.” John joked.

“That’s not funny.” You whined.

“It is. You’ll come ‘round, just give it time.”

“I’m still baking him a cake.” You mumbled.

——————

“Mum police are here again!” Jj called from the front door.

You had just gotten Lily down for her nap and were coming down the stairs. The officer was standing in your foyer clearly having stepped in on his own or Jj invited him in.

“Jj go hang out in your room for a little.” You smiled sweetly and he nodded.

“And don’t invite police in again, you know how your dad feels about that.” You whispered and he nodded seemingly confused.

“I thought it was just that other cop.” Jj whispered back. You paused with your mouth open to say something and then stopped. With a shrug you sent Jj on his way and turned your attention to the officer in your home.

“Hello, I’m Officer Fitzpatrick.” The middle aged man nodded to you.

“Uh, hi. Would’ve thought Officer Parker would be the one stopping by if it was police.” It was a poor attempt at humor that didn’t seem to affect the officer.

“He’s been dealing with a different case, regarding your neighbor down the street.” He sounded almost annoyed by this fact.

“This is about the break in that happened here recently.” He continued.

“Let’s talk on the porch, I don’t want my kids to hear.” Motioning to your door you and the officer walked on to your front porch and you shut the door behind you.

“Yes. Have there been anymore sightings like you’ve reported in the past. With the arrest of your neighbor and the break in here it seems a lot of people in the area are on edge. Considering your neighbor was in custody when the break in happened we want to make sure we have the right guy.” By the end of his long winded explanation you felt somewhat lectured. As if you were some clueless woman who had no idea what was going on.

“Uh- haven’t seen anything.” You answered dismissively.

“When was the last time there was suspicious activity?” It was like this officer was socially inept how he continued his barrage of questions.

“The break in. Before that officer Parker mentioned a peeping Tom. We assumed it was the neighbor.” You felt off explaining these things. Like these were things the officer should know.

“A peeping Tom? Did he say who reported this?” You watched as the man scribbled down in his note book.

“No. He told me he couldn’t disclose that information.” You had been slowly inching your way back to the front door.

“Hm. The break in-”

“You know I don’t really want to be doing this again. It spooked my family pretty bad, especially me. So I’m going to go back inside.” You had already opened the door and were ready to slip back inside.

“I have a few more questions.” Officer Fitzpatrick urged.

“Oi, leave her be. I can answer anything you need to know.” John was just rounding the house.

He was stepping out of your garden and shutting the rod iron fence behind him. You were curious what he was doing in there and waited for him to join you. John didn’t need this cop drudging up your feelings about the matter. You were still shaken up and would cry at times about your guilt. That didn’t even scratch the surface of the anxiety you were left with.

John now had to check the house top to bottom before bed and even then you had trouble falling and staying asleep. You refused to go down to your office unless John accompanied you and overall were having trouble settling back in to normal life. It was no fault of your own John admitted what happened traumatized you. So, with a cop on his doorstep, asking questions that left you feeling morally bankrupt, John didn’t feel like this was a great way for you to heal.

“Go inside darling.” John nodded at you.

No part of him wanted you to realize what was going on but it was too late for that. Things were weighing on you enough and as your husband, John wanted to protect you. The details of what happened were unimportant and with a cop now sniffing around, John didn’t trust that you wouldn’t accidentally tip him off.

Walking back inside you saw Lily holding on to the posts of the railing and going down the stairs one at the time. She had a big smile on her face and waved to you as she got to the bottom stair.

“Lily, you should be sleeping.” You said in a chipper tone with a smile.

“Mummy.” Lily stopped on the bottom step and spoke seriously.

“Yes.” You laughed.

“I remember who gave me the tulip at swim.” The big toothy grin sent a shiver down your spine.

John hadn’t specified who broke in. You trusted him when he told you it was better you didn’t know.

“It was Mr. Jamie.” This was the fourth or fifth person Lily had named as to who gave her the tulip. She had convinced herself if she could remember then John would never yell at her again.

“My friend?” You shook your head and went to take Lily back upstairs.

“Yes.” She seemed very serious but you were use to her misremembering things, after all she was four.

“I think you’re remembering it wrong sweetheart.” Kissing her head Lily rolled her eyes.

“Carry me?” Lily pursed her lips and looked up at you through her eyelashes. You did as she asked and went and napped with her upstairs. Some sleep felt better than worrying yourself sick about everything going on.

——————

“The kids are gonna love this.” You snickered.

You and John were at the edge of the pond in your back yard setting up a fun surprise for the kids. They had all fallen asleep in the living room after a day spent at the trampoline park. You made a joke about wanting to relax in a lazy river and John thought you could float on the pond.

So here you were, blowing up fun shaped rafts to float on. There was one for each of you besides Lily. You had set up a comfy spot for her on the dock to cuddle with Molly instead. Both you and John knew there was no chance Lily would get on a raft.

Looking up from your task you were surprised at the guest who arrived. You stopped what you were doing to watch as a familiar face approached you and John.

“Where the fuck is he!?” Officer Parker voice was venomous as he stormed past you and right toward John like he was looking for a fight.

“Woah what’s-“

Before you could finish Officer Parker took a swing at John. John hadn’t seen this coming and got clipped on the jaw, the punch barely connecting. You thought John would be livid but he looked amused, like when Jj would play fight with him. Officer Parker was going all in, swing after swing trying to hit your husband. John kept evading like it was child’s play until Parker full on lunged and tried to tackle John.

Now it was John’s turn and he swung fast and hard. The sound of his fist connecting full force with Officer Parker’s face felt like getting hit by a Mac Truck. Parker fell hard and you gasped at the sound of his head smacking against the ground. Instinctually Parker grabbed his eye where he’d been struck.

“John stop!!” You tugged John’s elbow but he shook you off. John already had Officer Parker by the collar and started to drag him like a rag doll.

“Let. Go. Or I’ll fucking kill you!” Officer Parker barked at John, his legs flailing as he tried to get up. Each attempt at getting up John would pull roughly and slam Parker into the earth and then continue dragging the man toward the pond.

“I’LL FUCKING KILL YOU!” Parker screamed, his voice being drown out by the splashing of water as John dragged him into the pond.

“Never gonna get the chance mate.” John growled as he pulled Parker in front of him, spat in his face, and then shoved him with all his strength under the water of the pond.

“John you’re gonna drown him!” You screeched, unwilling to get involved.

“That’s the point.” It sounded like a toss away comment.

John pulled Officer Parker out of the water for a second. The man flailed and gasped for air and then was brutally submerged again. John did this two more times as you begged him to stop.

“Stop! You’re actually gonna kill him!” You started to throw pool toys at John and they simply bounced off of him and floated around him as he drowned the police officer.

“Good.” Johns teeth were gritted yet amazingly he spoke evenly. It sounded like he was mowing the lawn and you asked him if he wanted water. As if drowning a man in the pond behind your house was a mundane task.

“The kids are home STOP!” This time you shrieked so loud it seemed to break through to John.

That was enough and John pulled the officer from the water and then dropped him so he went under on his own. Flailing his arms the officer was trying to swim to the surface and was struggling. You immediately took the few steps over to him and grabbed his hand and pulled until he was crawling out of your pond and gasping for air.

“What the fuck is wrong with you!?” Officer Parker was still coughing up water.

“You threatened to kill me. I was defending myself.” The excuse held no weight and you weren’t sure if John was being serious.

John trudged out of the water and brushed down his heard. His jeans were soaked from the knees down and his shirt was damp down the center. For someone who had just almost murdered a man John seemed incredibly calm. These were the moment you swore he was out of his mind. Being so comfortable with violence would never be something you could become accustom to unlike your husband.

“You’re going to go to prison for assaulting a fucking cop, John!” You were melting down about the implication of assaulting a police officer. The last thing you needed was John in jail and you raising three kids on your own.

“HA! No I’m not!” John laughed loud enough it carried across the yard. He was shaking his head and wagging his finger at you as if you were some naughty child caught with your hand in the cookie jar.

“What do you mean?” You took a few steps away from Officer Parker feeling uneasy about being close to him.

“You gonna tell her?” John looked a bit deranged as he asked the cop and then looked to you.

“What? Tell me it wasn’t actually the neighbor?” You snapped at John.

All of this was so confusing. After everything, you wanted a peaceful day with your children but again this buisness was being brought up when all you needed was to leave it behind.

“I was wrong about the neighbor, I’ll give you that. But he was still a fuckin’ creep so actually- you know what I was right! I was right about him too.” John was ranting at this point.

“You sound insane.” You told John hoping someone would explain what was going on.

“But this pricks brother was the one stalking you. Genius over here caught a wiff and I assume was trying to get ahead of it.” John was half shouting at this point and went as far as to kick Officer Parker over when he tried to get to his feet.

“I don’t know his brother- do I?” You said as you pushed John away before he started beating Parker senseless.

“He fucking works for you. Jamie Parker. And this muppet thought framing the neighbor would buy him time to get brother dearest to leave you be. . . Then I assume he realized neighbor boy was actually a fucking creep and had to deal with that. Am I wrong?” After another tirade you looked from John to Officer Parker for confirmation.

“Where is he?” Officer Parker struggled to get to his feet after being kicked to the ground pretty hard.

He was still coughing and now holding his shoulder from John’s blow. Officer Parker didn’t seem as angry anymore. It was probably because John just proved he’d drown him in the pond if he tried anything again.

“Only thing I can’t figure out is why you told Y/N you didn’t think it was the neighbor. That it had to be someone who knew her maiden name?” John asked, more like demanded.

“Where is he!” He hadn’t fully caught his breath but Officer Parker found the strength to yell.

“No clue. Ran off after he broke in.” John lied so convincingly you almost believed him.

“No, absolutely not. He’s a little weird but he’s been so normal. I’ve been mentoring him, we-“ You took a deep calming breath that didn’t help at all.

Jamie was not the person you thought would do this. He was a young man, mid twenties and handsome. He could’ve had any girl with a little bit of effort. There was no way he fancied you enough to do all this. Yes he was a little awkward at times and asked invasive questions but you chalked it up to him being young.

“We’ve had him over for dinner.” John finished for you.

“He’s fancied you since before you even knew who he was. You lectured at his university once as a favor to his professor. It’s been going on for years, he just got out of hand when you started mentoring him.” Officer Parker finally let on to what he knew.

“Out of hand!? Get the fuck off my property or I really will drown you.” John tried to charge Parker.

You quickly placed your hands on his chest to stop him because you knew John wouldn’t truck through you to get to the officer. The fact Parker put it so lightly only fueled John’s rage.

“Stop it!” You snapped at John.

“Why’d you get involved?” You asked but Officer Parker shook his head at you as if you were annoying.

Turning to John you could see it was taking all of his will power not to murder Parker.

“Answer her.” John ordered.

“Couldn’t turn him in. He’s family. But I couldn’t let him do-“ Parker cut himself off before he incriminated his brother further.

“He does the children’s exhibits. . . No wonder Lily knew him! I’ve left the kids with him so many times.” Part of you wanted to panic and scream but the feeling felt hollow. There was no point in freaking out beyond not having a lack of trust for people. There was no need for you to worry now.

Because he was dead.

“Where is he? He hasn’t come home, isn’t answering his phone, no show at work- which you know.” Officer Parker pointed at you but you immediately looked away and at John.

You hadn’t put two and two together but John must have. He was smart enough to keep it from you because you would’ve freaked out. And now you had to use your poker face to keep Ghost’s secret safe. You could freak out later.

“Like I said he ran off after he broke in. Think our dog scared him off.” John lied flawlessly again and you shook your head confirming it. Molly wasn’t even home she had gone with the kids to your dads.

“You fucking killed him didn’t you?!” Officer Parker stepped toward John again but you were standing in the middle of them.

“John wasn’t even here.” You butted in.

John pulled you to the side and squared up to Parker. He knew he wouldn’t go through you to get to Parker but didn’t know if Parker had any regard for you. It was incredibly satisfying watching Parker flinch as John’s stepped forward.

“I was out of the country. You can check.” John said condescendingly.

This seemed to stun Officer Parker. Horror was now etched across his face as he turned to you. With his mouth agape and wide eyes you both stared at each other for a long moment. You knew he knew what his brother had planned for you.

“You weren’t- were your kids home?” Looking from John to you in horror the severity of that break in seemed to set in.

“No, thank god! But I was by my fucking self while your psycho ass brother was in my basement office doing god knows what!” You shouted.

“Where is he.” Officer Parker asked calmly this time.

“Why did you get involved in this. What made it serious enough that you showed up at our home?” Stepping forward you put yourself in Officer Parker view but he waved you off.

You were absolutely done with this. The lack of answers was too much. Taking a ragged breath through your nose you reacted on impulse. Cocking your hand back you swung forward with all your strength. You punched this man with all the force you could muster and you swore in that moment you’d never felt so violent before. It occurred to you this was why John had a proclivity for violence; it felt good in the moment. You were so enraged you didn’t feel the pain radiating from your hand but kept your eyes glued on the man as he stumbled back a few steps and gripped his nose that was now leaking blood.

“What the fuck!?” He shouted at you.

“Good on you!” John was practically cheering you on.

“Tell me!” You shouted before slapping the officer once, twice and then trying to claw at him.

John gave you a second and then had his arm wrapped around your waist and pulled you back. He did wait and gave you a few good slaps and kicks before he stopped you. John lifted you off the ground when he realized you weren’t going to stop going after Parker and Parker wasn’t going to fight back.

“He- I found his journal and there were a lot of concerning details. I tried to get him help and when that didn’t work I tried to warn you two. I couldn’t blame it on your neighbor or you’d put your guards down but I also couldn’t turn my own brother in.” Finally the truth came spilling out. There was something about getting beat up by a woman half his size that was more terrifying than almost being drowned.

“Yeah and you’re lucky I’m not dead or I would SO kill you right now!” You all but screamed. You were kicking your feet and wiggling for John to put you down so you could have another go.

“Easy there killer.” John chuckled trying to calm you down like some rabid animal.

“Now, where is he? Did you kill him?” Officer Parker seemed desperate for answers himself.

“I wasn’t here. I don’t know what happened to him. But I hope he got what he deserved.” John nodded in a way you found odd.

Officer Parker stared at him for a long while. Water dripped off of him making the ground beneath him muddy. His left eye was swelling and turning red from John’s punch and his nose was bleeding from yours. The summer breeze picked up and blew strong making the officer shiver. There was a silent understanding that by the way your lives had continued you felt safe. With safety came the fact there was no more threat to you and your family.

“I’m going to find him.” Officer Parker hung his head for a moment before he started to walk toward his car parked in your driveway.

He’d accepted there would be no answers from you two. You weren’t sure why he gave up now after putting up such a fight. But John seemed to understand.

“Stay here.” John spoke to you softly and followed Officer Parker from a distance.

John watched the man climb into his personal car to leave. They shared another long look before Officer Parker’s red rimmed eyes closed for a moment. He nodded his head a few times before giving John once last look. Putting the car into reverse, Officer Parker went to leave your property and swore to himself he would never come back.

“Oi!” John called out which had Officer Parker stopping and looking back in surprise.

John held up a finger for him to wait and then disappeared inside. A minute or two later John appeared out of the side door of the laundry room with something in his hand. Bending down so they were eye level John handed over the journal Parker’s brother left behind.

“We made copies. But you should have it.” It was clear to him why he was doing it but John felt it better to not have that disgusting book in his home anymore. It would ruin any progress you made if you ever stumbled upon it.

“Thanks.” With slight hesitation Parker took it.

The leather bound book felt icy in his fingers and made his stomach twist at the knowledge John had read the depraved thoughts of his brother. The pages held such grotesque entries that made it clear no person would feel comfortable in their home again if who wrote it were still breathing.

“He was sick.” Officer Parker weakly tried to explain.

“Well, he’s not anymore. Cheers.” John stood back to his full height and patted the roof of the car.

——————

“That’s a lie.” Evelyn giggled loudly at her brother calling you out so rudely.

You were all sat down for dinner from your local Chinese food restaurant. Your kids were in their pajamas with how late you were eating. Looking over to John you didn’t know what to say to your son. You were a horrible liar so any attempt to say you weren’t would make you look more guilty.

“Oi, don’t call your mum a liar.” John pointed at his son using his fork. He barley looked up from his plate and continued eating.

“Mum did not break her hand by punching someone trying to steal an old ladies purse. How dumb do you think we are?” Jj looked at his father absolutely exasperated.

After Officer Parker had left John found you in the kitchen with a bag of peas on your hand. You were sobbing uncontrollably and John thought it was from the pain. It only took a few questions for him to figure out how horrible you felt for what happened. That what Ghost had done to protect you meant someone lost their life because of you.

But what made the tears flow endlessly was that you felt no remorse. Things were finally getting back to normal and you would have Ghost do it a hundred times over for this peace of mind; and that had you questioning your morals. It took a lot of soothing and comfort from John to help you accept things.

By the time you cried it all out you told John you most definitely broke your hand from punching Officer Parker in the face. John mentioned that he tried to teach you how to throw a proper punch but you refused to learn. You could throw a mean elbow but that was about it. You told him you were never going to resort to violence again unless him or one of the 141 boys murdered someone else. John tried to convince you again because the odds weren’t in your favor. This had you threatening to punch John and break your other hand if he didn’t swear to never allow that to happen again. It ended in a stale mate and you with a lime green cast, John still didn’t understand why you insisted on that color.

“You’re right.” John nodded and took a sip of his beer.

“It was a bank robbery. Your mum clocked the guy in the face and took his gun. People were cheering at her bravery. They’re thinking about naming her a town hero.” It was said so seriously you had to bite your lip to keep yourself from laughing.

“Banks closed on Sundays.” Evelyn poked a hole in John’s story expertly quick.

“I punched a fox trying to get at the chickens.” You lied with a cheeky smile.

“Mummy you shouldn’t punch foxes, they’re dirty.” Lily told you seriously.

“Oh, cmon! Mum clocked you dad. You finally mouthed off enough and drove her mad.” Jj was laughing to himself by the end of his own made up story.

“No, mum so slipped and fell going to the loo! She’s too embarrassed to admit it so dad’s trying to make her seem all tough.” It was now Evelyn’s turn to come up with a reason.

“Looks like you’ll never know.” John mused.

~~~~~tag list~~~~~

@exhaustedpotat0 @glitterypirateduck @ivymarquis @crazymela @what-0-life @boredfairy4 @hihhasotherfixations @stephanswhxre @shanjisan @k4es @luvleywrites @kita03-0 @midwesternwitchery @aleynaleia @suckerforbassist @misshoneypaper @theaonlax @blackstar9005 @tooterbutt @havoc973 @maladaptivedaydreamingbum @freshlemontea @cosmoscoffeee @sae1kie @ohworm-writes @ghostslittlegf @fanficwriterlover @arminarlertssword @faceache111 @azu21 @thirstyb-ches @nini-11-08 @sgtgarricks @kiki-is-hyperfixating @mayflysdie @aliceinwonderland-5678 @blue096 @rip-cod-brainrot @saturnghost93 @somehopeatlast @thepowers-kat-be @tenko-nii @eatingtheworldsoffanfiction @thraxpatty @mnsnp @faeriedust17 @livstablers @luvr4miya @phoenixhalliwell @maissalov3u @ellerdod @tizzywoowoo @himboelover

AAAA

pov: you just looked up from flirting with sgt. mactavish for the past half hour in the rec room wyd

👑Platonic cod with a younger reader who has adhd and got extremely over stimulated by rude soldiers? (People suck)

Thank ya😙

K first of all I don't know hoooow tf I missed that you made a request, thank you, and I gotchu (people do in fact suck).

I'm not sure if I wrote out what you asked for, but this is what I came up with. I do hope you like it.

(This will be a gn!reader I hope that's ok!)

Platonic!141 x gn!reader

Warning: bullying, swearing, badly written fight scenes, actually just bad writing in general.

Dividers by: @cafekitsune

Working with the best of the best comes with a very heavy burden.

For one thing, all of your relationships end up in the gutter or strained even if they're family, friends, or even actual people you're interested in.

But this was an outlet for you to better yourself.

It gave you a routine, and it taught you discipline.

Even if all you wanted to do was sit down and let your mind spiral for even a moment. Even if you wanted to get up from your seat and just fucking move.

How you ended up here is something you have a hard time understanding. But you climbed your way to the top. You've earned your place. So well in fact you've found a home with Laswell. She introduced you to John, and thanks you him, you have a new calling.

Unfortunately, that leads everything full fucking circle.

You start over again. The only ones who know who you are are John and Laswell. The other three know you, but from passing conversations when you're in meetings with them.

They just know you as the backup thanks to Price.

At first such a name easily put you down. No matter what you did, it wouldn't chance the way you felt about certain things. Like if there was a new mission, how everyone treated you like some low-man. Someone to just clean their shit everywhere they fucking go.

And to see the pity come from Garrick or the words of assurance from MacTavish. Oh, you felt tiny.

You just tried to fit in as best as you fucking could.

So you thought maybe making some friends would do you some good.

Until that turns out to be your biggest regret.

Every mistake someone else made, your name had to get thrown in there somehow.

One soldier didn't strap something down, right?

"(L/n) was supposed to help."

Another soldier didn't show up for inventory?

"(L/n) was holding me up."

Soldiers made a riot coming back into the barracks?

"Had to be all (L/n). Rather loud that one."

Jesus Christ, it was incredible the way your name was being drugged through the mud. Eventually, you just stopped interacting with people altogether unless it was absolutely necessary.

Like right now. It's sparring time with your teams. The 141 were busy training among themselves while you were left with your usual 'team.'

One of them straight up walked right up to you, leaning in close so you were the only one who heard. "Honestly, a runt like you doesn't fuckin' belong here." they snicker. "You really think the 141 took a liking to you? You only got to where you were because you got Laswell wrapped around your little finger."

You roll your eyes, ripping away from them before stepping up to the ring. The previous pair had ended their session.

The original partner you were sparring made no sign to move, until you realized the soldier who was just talking to you was making their way into the ring.

You sigh in defeat, unable to think of a reason to get back out. What were you gonna do? Cry about? This wasn't a schoolyard, this was the military.

"Whenever you're ready, runt."

Unbeknownst to you, a few sets of eyes were on you, and not just from your training group surrounding the ring like a pack of wolves.

You felt trapped. You felt targeted. For a while of this happening, it was just too much in this instance. Your head wasn't in the fucking game.

Without that focus, that soldier took you down like you weighed absolutely nothing. One grab and a trip over his foot, you were on your back.

Not even the blows you were landing on the side of his face were doing you any good. Eventually, you did get the upper hand, only to humiliatingly get kicked right in the head.

Everything went dark after the pain blossomed from that side.

This wasn't you. You knew that. You knew you were so much better than this. But how the absolute hell were you to fight this without getting into some drama?

How were you going to prove to those asswipes you belonged here?

Waking up, you squint your eyes at the blinding white light just above you. Blinking to settle them, your sight lands on Price sitting in the corner right next to the door.

His arms are leaning on the armrest as his eyes bore into yours.

For a second you don't say anything until he clears his throat. But even then, he beats you to it.

"Seems I came at the perfect time." He grins. It's small, almost friendly. With a level of professionalism behind it. "Was wanting to talk to you about what happened."

Like a balloon, you feel yourself deflate. Your eyes refuse to meet his after that sentence and all you let out is a quiet, "Oh."

The captain coughs, a light smoker cough you would guess before sitting forward and leaning his elbows on his knees.

"That soldier you were sparring with. Has there been any altercation with 'em?" Price asked, earnestly curious. "Maybe something that was done a while ago that hadn't been brought to my attention?"

You inhale, holding your breath. This felt childish. Right? Tattle-telling on a soldier?

It wasn't like you guys weren't already fighting so...if anything this was on you. It had to be. You just need to better your skills. There is always going to be someone better. There is always going to be someone stronger. There is always something-

"(L/n)." Price interrupts your racing thoughts. "It's up to you if you want to say something. You're not in trouble."

He stands, his hand holding his wrist right in front of him as he slowly walks towards the foot of your bed.

He reaches over, tying your bootlaces as he speaks.

"I know you, (L/n). You're strong. But I'm sure you know there is always someone stronger. That's why your speed and that mind of yours are what drew Laswell to you. You know this."

You finally let a long breath out of your nose, blinking rapidly. "I know."

"Good."

Price gently finishes the bow he made out of your laces, and pats your boot. Another sly smile on his face. "Well, you know," He continues, "This isn't a friendship club. We're all adults here. And you surely won't get in trouble if you know..."

He stares into your eyes knowingly. "...decide you've had enough of the bullshit. Right?"

Your brows slowly furrow in, unsure if you're reading his words correctly. But he doesn't elaborate further. Instead, he turns and walks to the door. "Oh by the way," He turns to look at you. "Ghost and the others will be handling your training during your conditioning hours. Be on time now, (Y/n)."

With that, he slips out the door, leaving you to dwell on his hidden messages. If that's what you should call it.

...

"Again."

You groan from the ground, eyes landing on the hand in front of you and the grin from Soap. "Come on, then. Up ye go." He quips as he pulls you to your feet.

"Try tha' again. And remember to put all that strength into that kick. That's yer knockout. Ghost? Ready?"

The lieutenant's brown eyes bore into yours. It reminds you of Price sitting intensely in the corner of the medical room. Fighting the lieutenant doesn't feel as...well...violent? If that's the right term to use.

Sure this lean, mean, killing machine is a much harder target to fight. But you can't complain. Especially since he is kicking your fucking ass.

"If you step to the left again," Ghost warns. "You'll be rollin' off the side of that ring."

Yeah. Safe to say you've been at this for a while now.

Before you can even begin, the door to the gym opens and a whistle sounds out. "Tav!" Sergeant Garrick's voice sounds out. "Price needs you!"

Soap breathes out his nose before nodding towards you. "Strengthen that kick, you'll have the fucker down before he even blinks." He speaks as he starts to walk to the doorway. Something tells you he isn't referring to Ghost.

The sergeants tap each other, sort of like they tap each other into a situation, which brings a small chuckle to your face.

"Come on, (L/n)." Ghost calls to you. "Need your focus, not trying to send you back to medical."

The recent memory deflates your newfound joy just as Garrick reaches the end of the ring. Before you could even take your stance, you see Ghost wag his finger at you. "Try that again."

You frown. "Sorry?"

You begin to maneuver your stance, thinking you were off balance or something of the sort before he walks up to you and pokes you right between your collarbone.

"When someone is fucking nitpicking you. Stop givin' them a reaction." He grunts. "They know how to hurt you. People you trust would even use that against you."

Garrick leans on one of the ropes, adding in. "Keep your face straight when you're up against someone." He points to Ghost. "If you can't see their emotions, you can't predict their next move."

Just as he says that Ghost becomes lax, looking into your soul with his hands to his sides. You swallow a groan, feeling your body screaming at you.

Like, you fully believed Sergeant Garrick, Ghost really didn't have to show you what he meant.

But then the lieutenant just starts...stalking around you. The both of you go in circle after circle until he finally,

and might I say finally,

strikes.

You jump in your skin, feeling one arm go around your waist, the other hoisting the rest of you up and just dropping down onto the mat with a loud 'oof'. The impact takes the wind right out of you.

You lay there for a moment, with half of the 141 task force staring at your position.

"You really didn't have to do all that." You wheeze out. "I fully believed you."

A hand is outreached to you, and with mild (not so mild) hesitation, you take it. Ghost pats you on the back as you take your walk of shame to the bench right on the side, next to Gaz.

"You know, that was a lot more patience than we thought you were gonna show." He smiles. "Truly. The amount of times Ghost gets Soap with that trick? Never gets old."

He reaches behind you, grabbing a water bottle that was passed to him by your lieutenant and handing it to you. "Honestly, I don't think I've ever seen you make that first move before, Ghost."

The lieutenant chuckles, leaning on the ring. "No. The little soldier had me tired of waiting." He opens his own bottle, picking it up to his lips. "You could really use tha' the next time that prick wants to give you shit."

You frown, confused. "What do you-"

"Soldier," Gaz sighs. "We see the way you let these tossers treat you. You could have said or done something about it a lot sooner."

You're quiet for a moment before sitting up straight and taking another drink of water. "Just don't want to cause issues. Laswell wanted me to take care of myself."

"But to let these nobody's treat you like shit? For the sake of laying low when you don't have to?" Gaz's words have you making eye contact with him. He's staring at you as if he's trying to pull you apart, find out something that really isn't hard to find.

You don't like confrontation. Never was your strong suit. If you needed something shut down, it was difficult to do on your own.

Not impossible sure, but when you're constantly the punching bag it takes a toll on your confidence.

Hell, that's why you joined the military. What else did you have going for yourself?

"Yeah...I guess I just didn't wanna hurt anyone."

"Well, we're not telling you to kill anyone." Ghost cuts in. His steel eyes bore into yours. "Not now anyways."

At that, and you're not sure why, but you crack a smile. Nodding you finish off your water bottle and stand up.

"Am I excused, sir?" You look to Ghost, who only nods his head.

"See you tomorrow, soldier."

...

The next day, both the sergeants and the lieutenant meet you in the gym. It's eerily empty again, save for a few stragglers talking in the corner.

Soap spots you first, giving you a grin. "Righ' on time. In the ring, now."

A sigh leaves your lips as he ducks under and over the bars of the ring, seeing as you're fighting the most excited member today.

"Oh, I'm sorry, did ye wan' Gaz to be in front of ye? We can arrange tha'-"

"No!" You hiss out. "No, please God, no. This is fine. Just...just don't do that fucking thing with your arm and your thumb."

Gaz heaves a large sigh. "Soap we told you to stop doin' that to the rookies."

"Aye, but they're not a rookie now? Are they?" Soap grins.

"MacTavish."

"Aye, sir."

You laugh, setting down your items before joining Soap in the ring. "Alright. What are we working on today?"

The room falls silent, watching as the smile remains on the sergeant's face but then he leans back into the ropes, shrugging.

"Last day of conditioning. Just wanted to talk."

Your brows furrow. "Sorry?"

"You heard him." Ghost calls from behind you, on the other side of the barricade. "You're just talking."

"Aye." Soap puts his hands behind his back, walking towards you. "And just know, truly, 's nothin' personal."

Confusion hits you harder than any punch you received this week. You didn't know what that meant. Nor what it could mean. It scared you only for a moment until Soap reached out and shoved you off balance.

Immediately, you try and position yourself before he tuts at you. "Nae. I'm not fightin' ye today."

You lower your hands, the body still tensed because you don't know what's happening.

"Sorry, I'm lost here."

"Aye. Small minded. Cannae says I'm surprised."

What?

"Sorry?"

"Stop apologizing." The sergeant snaps. "We'll have to work on tha' too."

You're arms crossed, almost like you're guarding yourself. A confused smile breaks through your face, and now you're really unsure of what the fuck is happening.

"Can someone explain to me-"

"Ye need an explanation?" Soap sneers. "Need someone to hold yer fuckin' hand all the time?"

He's walking right next to you, going around you like a shark in the water. "How have ye made it this fuckin' far?" He laughs, and a deep grave tone settles in his voice. "Ye think people owe ye the respect we've earned?"

Ouch. Yeah, that one hurt a bit. You've only been a part of this task force for a fucking year. And you assumed you and Soap formed a small friendly bond.

"How did ye survive selection." he continues. "Honestly. The amount of fuckin' crap ye must've tapped away on should be extraordinary."

"Dude." You scoff. "What the fuck is happening?"

"Again with the fuckin' questions. Ye really think you're gonna get any answers," for once, from this weird interrogation (if that's what you call it), he hesitates. His eyes glance at Ghosts, staring before he nods. You don't even get the chance to say anything or even look behind you before he hits you with it. "A runt like ye doesn't belong here."

The room falls silent. So quiet you could hear a pin drop.

If it wasn't for the way Soap's Adam's apple was bobbing around, you would've taken him very seriously. His eyes refused to leave yours. But you can see the nervousness.

You understood what this was.

Your anger dies down, and you fight any emotion that threatens to come up. It's not easy. You spent years trying to control your emotions. Holding things in, disassociating as a coping mechanism.

This is not the time nor the place to do that, however.

"Nothing to say? Runt?" Soap smirks. It's breaking him.

"Runt's never have a thing to fuckin say. Too busy worrin' bout-"

"Say somethin', (L/n)." Ghost states in the middle of the sergeant's degradation. "Go on then. Give him what he wants."

'Try that again.' the lieutenant's voice goes through your head. 'They know how to hurt you. People you trust can use that against you.'

"Come on then. Say somethin'." Soap hisses right beside your ear. "Aren't ye just dying to run along? Tell me? What'd ye plan on doing, runt?"

You stay rigid as can be. Your eyes never leave a spot you choose to stare at. If you stared at it long enough, you can just mentally check out of this. It'll go by faster.

"Yer just gonna stand there, are ye? Keepin' quiet like a good little solder? Doin as yer told-"

Your eyes snap to his. Emotionless, with a cold smile on your face.

It successfully stops Soap from whatever he was going to say next. The both of you stare at one another for a moment before Soap is the first to break. "Good." He grins. "You finished your last training."

Soap pats you on your shoulder, walking away from you until he's out of the ring.

"What the fuck was that...?" You question. "What You just...hurt my fuckin' feelings and call it training?"

"If we gave you a sticker would you feel better?" Gaz asks, sarcasm dripping though his teeth. "We're teaching you what to do the next time you're in a pinch."

Ghost knocks on the ring floor from his side. "You can't always use your fist, (L/n). But you can always trust that minimal interaction is the best way to get them frustrated."

"And if they decide they need to get physical," Gaz points to Soap, as the other sergeant sits on the bench, finishing his sentence. "Then ye have full authority to let loose!"

"To an extent." Ghost warns.

You blink up at the ceiling, light huffs of laughter breaking from your throat. "You guys are tellin' me," You walk towards the edge, leaning on the ropes. "That this is all because you want me to-"

"earn your respect, (L/n)." The Captain's voice rings out from the entryway. "Show these muppets just why you were handpicked for us."

...

The next team training came a lot sooner than you thought. You've had minimal interaction with the prior group until you were in sparring teams again. What was supposed to be four groups of six, ended up turning into a giant turn-taking fight. People were standing off to the sides, watching the fights go on.

The same asshole from before walks right up to you, standing shoulder to shoulder as you watched the first two soldiers go at it.

It ends with one picking the other up, and dropping him upon his side, a sticking crack sounding from the fall.

A series of 'ooohs' goes around the ring, even the winner kneeling before his partner and helping him out of the ring.

"Take him to medical." The Captain excuses them. He turns to you, motioning to the ring. "You're up (L/n)."

You choose not to make a sound, nor give much of a reaction. Until the asshole's name gets called out to enter with you. His sickening laugh prickles your skin as you make eye contact with all three of the other members across the gym. They each nod at you before you turn around and face your opponent.

"You ready for another beatdown, runt?" He smirks, fists up.

"Keep it focused, Soldiers. if you have time to talk, you have time to waste. And I don't want my fucking time wasted." Price hollers from the side.

Your opponent grins at you, watching your every move. You don't take a stance right away. Your arms appear limp y your sides as you begin to circle each other. You're on high alert, unsure if you would be at this for some time like your training with the lieutenant.

"Come on, runt. You gonna make a move?" He teases. "Come on. Show me that big guy mental the boy showed you this week."

His comment breaks you. A smile cracks through your facade and you can hear Soap speak. "Show time."

Your opponent's patience wears thin, as he rushes and throws a punch right to your left side. Where you had the habit of turning to. But you step to your right, reel back your hand, and land a punch right to his throat.

The soldiers around wince and groan at the sight. But you take no moment to stop before you wrap an arm around his waist and flip him over when the other lifts his legs over your shoulder.

He hits the ground with a loud thud, immediately trying to get back up. His sight must've not been all there, as he stumbles and lands on his knee. "Piece of fucking shit-"

"Oh shut up." You groan out before you swing your leg around, your heel meeting his jaw, and knocking him out.

You sigh, relief flooding your veins as you put an arm up in victory. Turning to the guys with a bright, toothy grin on your face.

"There's that bright smile." Laswell chuckles beside Price. "Hasn't done that in some time."

The captain nods, watching as you make your way straight to his three teammates, each of them patting you with their own words of praise.

"Oh, yes." He sends you his own nod of approval when you turn to look at him with a light that seems to return to your eyes. "Glad it came back."

Thanks for requesting- so sorry it took forever to come out.

Please comment and/or reblog I'd appreciate it! Requests are open!

pov: movie night with the riley’s 🫶

Ghost: disrespect abounds here

Caulder in hunter green