Happy, Then: Ugh, Kids.

I was promised an army. You have a supersoldier. CAPTAIN!PEGGY CARTER in WHAT IF? (2021).

Justice League Meeting

Superman: where’s Batman? The meeting was supposed to start 20 minutes ago.

Wonderwoman: could he be in danger?

Green Arrow: someone maybe should call him BEFORE we go into defcon 1

Superman: [calls the bat-line]

Oracle: [answers] this is O. How can I help?

Superman: Hi Oracle. Batman was supposed to be at the tower 20 minutes ago. Do you know where he is?

Oracle: let me check… yeah, he’s at the cave, I can connect you to the security cameras?

Superman: Please.

Oracle: ok.

-The batcave shows up on screen, Bruce and some of the kids present-

Batman: [Mid sentence] -OUTRAGEOUS STUNT!!

Damian: [scowling, arms crossed] -tt-

Batman: Do NOT scoff at me, young man!

Jason: [snorts]

Batman: Are you Laughing?! This is reckless even by YOUR standards Jason!

Jason: yeah… but you said-

Batman: [menacing] What?!

Jason: [looks at Dick and mimes “young man”]

Batman: Don’t look at-

Dick: [loudly and jovially] THERE’S NO NEED TO FEEL DOWN

Batman: Wh-

Steph: I said YOUNG MAN [spins to point at Tim]

Tim: [Fingerguns at Steph] Pick yourself off the ground!

Batman: [floundering] En-

Dick: I said YOUNG MAN

Jason: ‘Cause you’re in a new town!

Duke: [from the locker rooms] There’s no need to be unhappy!

Batman: [to Duke] You’re not even in trouble!

Steph and Tim: YOUNG MAN there’s a place you can go!

Dick: [throws an arm around Jason’s shoulders] I said YOUNG MAN! When you’re short on your dough!

Jason: You can STAY THERE!

Batman: That’s EN-

Dick and Jason: [turn to Damian, grinning expectantly] and I’m sure you will find-!!

Damian: [glaring and without enthusiasm] …many ways to have a good time.

Batman: Don’t-

All the batkids: [chorusing] It’s fun to stay at the B-A-T CAVE

Batman: [finally loses it] WHY???!!

-

Superman: …

Green Arrow: …well someone has to say it.

The Flash: That he should get an award for parenting that lot?

Green Arrow: that clearly inherited behaviour has nothing to do with genetics. I grew up with Bruce Wayne; he deserves every second of this

Alternative Maribat

Batman takes Marinette to the watch tower for whatever reason. Second everyone sees her

Superman: Batman, step away. Good. Ok, who has the least tragic backstory, least dark life, but still has the power to protect her?

Aquaman: I do not know who that child is but I want to protect them and make sure there are only good things in her life.

Flash: Same, but I’m out. If I run her anywhere and am not careful…well bodies aren’t designed for that speed. Same with you as I’m pretty sure she can’t breathe underwater

Batman: She’s-

Superman: No. Not with your current dark knight routine. 

Manhunter: I could help.

Superman: You sure, John?

Marinette: So you know I already have parents, I’m not a sidekick, still underage, and have class to get to. Batsy just sort of brought me for some reason I’m still not sure of

Batman: Because you are a new member of the Justice League and we protect our own. 

Marinette: I’m struggling with keeping Paris safe let alone fighting everything you do. 

Manhunter: I can learn French.

Marinette: I really didn’t ask for-

Green Lantern (passing her a ring): Here, in case you ever need some protection. I’ll get another

Wonderwoman: Batman once mentioned you were struggling with a liar. I will escort you home to expose them unless you would just like my lasso yourself. 

Marinette: I really-

Batman: So we have decided. John you will join Marinette in Paris pretending to be her new teacher so you can protect her there. Wonder woman you will make sure all around her are good people. Superman you’ll find Hawkmoth and defeat him. 

Marinette: I’m really really scared to ask but what will you be doing?

Batman: Hawkgirl is going to give your boyfriend a little visit while I talk to the other one about what happens if you get hurt.

Marinette: Wonder if Fluff will let me go back in time to avoid all this

Batman: We can also time travel so don’t do that

Marinette: Don’t you have a world to protect? Surely Joker is doing something or someone?

Batman (shrugs): Someone will take care of it. Think Constantine is down there? Green Arrow? Someone will deal with it.

Understanding the Johansson/Disney lawsuit thanks to Twitter wisdom…

Here’s part of Disney’s statement…

Yes. They’re excusing a breach of contract over the pandemic. Oh. So righteous.

And because context is everything…

Some say Johansson made a dick move because Disney is “the hands that feeds her”. I wonder if they’d say the same thing if this was Tom Cruise or Robert Downey Jr or some MAN of the likes.

Last, but not least:

I say: good for her. Go after the mouse. Let it all burn if you have to.

✨Slay✨

Don’t leave out any hard of hearing children who come to your door this Halloween, take a minute out of your day to learn a few seasonal asl signs!  These are two different variations of “Happy Halloween” Click here for my source.

Guys I don’t normally post petitions, but if you can please sign. This is cruel. They are people to and deserve to be able to get the help they need.

The US has come up with a guideline that would deny people with learning disabilities and severe cognitive delays the right to critical care if they get the coronavirus.

This is a nightmare because this is how Hitler once began euthanizing the mentally ill in hospitals. This is how eugenics started. Please, please do one of the following to stop this guideline from continuing:

- Start a petition to the appropriate officials

- Talk with your local officials & share your concerns

- Share this post everywhere & make your friends & family aware of the issue. This is important.

Metro

People with Down syndrome could be left to die of coronavirus to 'save' supplies

Disability advocacy groups are seeking clarification on vague guidelines which explain how coronavirus patients should be prioritized during

I know the popular take is Batman's rogues getting their butts handed to them by Bruce Wayne, and I'm not belittling that, because that's really funny for all stated reasons?

But how about a new take: most of Batman's rogues call him off limits, because they find out he is their benefactor, when/if they try to reform?

Mr Freeze won't touch him because when he's in Arkham, Bruce is the one who finances the research to help Nora Fries.

Poison Ivy won't touch him because he had been the one supplying her with plants, while in prison.

Harley won't touch him because he's just a great guy an' gotham needs guys like that.

Riddler won't touch him because he was the secret backer that time Eddie tried to open a detective agency.

Croc won't touch him because he's one of the few people who ever talks to him like a person.

Deadshot refuses any hits on him because he found out Wayne does a lot of secret work for people down on their luck who made bad mistakes.

A persons fanfic tells you a lot about them, i , a fanfic writer, realize in terror

Cité des Démons; Part 3

Summary: The Dupain-Chengs have had enough of Paris, they’re tired of their daughter being bullied by those she once called her friends. In an effort to escape the pain of Paris they move to the most crime ridden city in the world for a spice of something new.

Note: I changed the year things happened if you couldn’t tell. Instead of becoming Ladybug at thirteen it happened at the age of twelve. This part is Marinette explaining to the Bats (minus Barbara) about her past, what happened in Paris, and why she should help them.

Prologue | Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3

•••

Marinette had given both Bruce Wayne and Dick Grayson, otherwise known as Batman and Robin respectively, when she jumped off a building the first time only to have a yoyo appear at her side and used as a grappling hook. When they met on a roof a bit away she just laughed at their stunned faces, taking a bit of pride in it. The girl missed free running but Gotham wasn’t her territory and she wasn’t going back to Paris unless the Akumas come back. She seriously was having withdrawls when it came to the lack of a superhero identity. 

Keep reading

Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets Outtake.  The snake head of Jason’s Lucius cane gets caught in Dan’s robes.